The theme of Made in Chelsea this week is: cheating. If we cast our minds back, cheating in relationships has run through the very core of Made in Chelsea - leaving a trail of broken hearts behind. Whether it's physical or emotional, cheating storylines have been a driving force of MIC storylines.
Who could forget Millie Mackintoshraising a glass to her best friend Rosie Fortescue for cheating with her now husband Hugo Taylor? Or when Alex Mytton cheated on Binky more times than we can count? In more recent times Zara McDermott cheated on Sam Thompson and Sam Prince cheated on Inga Valentier (and pretty much every other woman he's dated.)
However, last night on the show the focus was on whether Reza Amiri-Garrousicheated on Ruby Adler.We would say we are shocked at his alleged actions, but we're not. Whilst they were still in a relationship Ruby was also flirting with Miles so, their relationship has had many flaws. This elite circle of friends have a very strange moral stance on cheating: they condemn each other for it yet still do it.
There is a lot of hypocrisy within the friendship group and it's about time someone called it out. In our opinion, there isn't another reality show with a higher rate of cheating or where cheating is such an acceptable act - especially from the men. While these dramatic storylines do bring the drama and create social buzz, there is still a huge effect on real emotions and feelings - which aren't just for show. These are their real relationship breakdowns on display for the nation. When Harvey Armstrongrecently cheated on Emily Blackwell, we could tell she was deeply hurt by it. Many of them also stay with their partners despite the blatant cheating. But why is this?
Psychologist Darren Stanton said on behalf of Slingo: 'People can remain in a relationship despite a cheating partner for lots of different reasons. The top one is love, they simply love the other person and no matter what or how they are treated they remain with them out of a sense of love and devotion. Some people are emotionally damaged and therefore grow an attachment to the other person, they seek strength from them so even the slightest bit of attention or affection will give them what they need.'
He continued, 'In my one-to-one work as a psychologist some partners were very blatant and made no attempt to hide the fact that they were cheating. The thing that makes people stay in a relationship despite their partner being unfaithful generally stems from a sense of needing to be needed, wanting physical or emotional affection or perhaps being financially secure.'
We must remember Made In Chelseacenters the lives of the socially elite 20-somethings. When you are raised with the belief that you can have everything you want; money, power and status - this can surely trickle down into relationships. The idea of cheating is not as rogue when you know you can easily get whoever and whatever you want.
David Dubois, Derek Rucker, and Adam Galinsky addressed this in several experiments reported in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. They set out to answer if those from upper class backgrounds are 'less ethical.' They delved into the hypothesis: since money is generally associated with power and education with prestige, is it possible that power is the key part of class status that alters selfishness?
Participants of the study had to rate their socioeconomic status (a combination of income, education, and occupation), their sense of power ('I can get others to do what I want,' etc), and their sense of prestige ('People generally admire me,' etc). They also rated whether they’d perform the unethical acts like cheating on an exam.
From the study they found that those who felt higher in class felt higher in both power and prestige, but only a sense of heightened power went on to correlate with willingness to engage in unethical behaviour. So, it appears that class increases selfishness specifically by making people feel more powerful.
Darren explained, 'If people are generally financially well-off I found that they were able to rationalise it to themselves why they cheat and mistreat another person. This is the balancing of the bad behaviour in their mind in order to justify things to themselves. When someone is wealthy and cheats on their partner but still provides them with a lot of luxuries then they do not feel that they are doing anything wrong. They balance off the guilt by the fact that they are providing financially for their partner.'
Match's dating expert, Hayley Quinn, added: 'If you've been cheated on, just make sure that any decision to stay in a relationship is based on your partner's full accountability, and willingness to change - and not a fear that you won't find anyone else. Real commitment, is just like it says on the tin, a shared decision to both double down, commit and invest in the relationship. So for this to work, you both need to be all in. '
I believe what also plays into the increased acceptance of cheating stems from the nature of dating today. The freedom you have on dating apps and chasing the next best thing with each swipe also alters reality. Sometimes the next best thing isn't what people should be chasing. However, it's a lot easier today and surely even easier within these elite circles.
While everything noted may not relate to every relationship experience on Made In Chelsea, is does give a look into the mentality within elite friendship circles. Cheating has been a constant theme on the show and it's been normalised, which isn't okay. It only leaves the person on the receiving end feeling hurt and betrayed.
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