The Mega Hen Do Is Over – And Thank God For That

If there’s one positive to this pandemic it’s that it has saved us from the out-of-hand hen party, says Anna Silverman.

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by Anna Silverman |
Updated on

Before the pandemic, we were already beginning to feel the rumblings of a backlash over the ridiculous ritual that is the Mega Hen. We’ve all been to one, or at least managed to wrangle our way out of one after seeing the itinerary: they usually involve five fancy dress outfits, a £400 flight and a week of your hard-earned annual leave.

But now that our travel plans for the next year or two have been thwarted we won’t be able to ‘pop to Marbella’ for a five days as easily. In fact, even being in a large group could be considered life-risking. And as we hurtle towards the worst economic recession in our lifetimes, dropping £1k on a hen do just isn’t going to fly. If there’s one positive to this pandemic, it’s that it has saved us from the out-of-hand hen party.

Before, if you tried to explain that you’d be left without food and rent money by joining the 25-strong hen to Vegas you’d be guilt-tripped into feeling like a terrible friend. Now, we might be forgiven for suggesting Cornwall instead of Coachella. We might even be spared the penis straws if a bridesmaid decides they’re unhygienic.

Over the past few months, groups of 20 and 30-something women everywhere will have received a message along the lines of ‘Because of this pesky Covid, it is with a heavy heart that we have decided to cancel our lovely Sarah’s* hen soiree in Ibiza.’ If they’re lucky, it will go on: ‘We hope to reschedule but we will probably do something in the UK next year as who knows if we’ll be able to travel!'

When my friend Lucy received a similar WhatsApp recently she said a sub-group popped up immediately in which the gist was: ‘Thank GOD! I couldn’t afford it anyway.’ Claire is thankful a hen do she was meant to be going to in Barcelona was cancelled. She and a few of the bride-to-be’s close friends met her on the day for a picnic in a London park last week instead.

‘We had such a lovely time and I feel that’s all you need from a hen,’ she says. ‘If we’d gone to Barcelona, I bet I’d have come back begrudging half of my friends – and the bride – like I usually do, because I hate having to spend all my money on stupid activities like cocktail-making classes. The whole thing was working out at over £600. This mini, fake hen was far less forced and was really fun; we got pissed in the park on rose and played rounders. One of the bridesmaids (who just got engaged) even said she’d do something similar when hers comes around next year. I really hope people organise smaller celebrations because of this and realise that’s all you need.’

As we hurtle towards the worst economic recession in our lifetimes, dropping £1k on a hen do just isn’t going to fly.

Last year, a survey by MyVoucherCodes found the average hen or stag cost £204.82 per guest. The year before, a poll of 2,000 UK adults by Provident found that the average pre-wedding bash abroad costs an eye-watering £998. The pandemic has brought the simmering resentment we all already felt about mega hen dos to a head and served as a catalyst to force us to reset this crazy tradition.

However, this hasn’t happened overnight. Over the past year, the tide has been slowly turning. It was already becoming cooler to keep your hen low-key or not bother having one at all. Before corona struck, I was supposed to be going to ‘pre-wedding drinks’ this spring, because the bride-to-be was so adamant she didn’t want a fuss.

A bridesmaid still took it upon herself to organise something, despite instructions from the bride not to, but the WhatsApp group stressed the ‘H’ word was not to be mentioned. Another two brides-to-be I know have begged friends not to throw them a hen because they felt bad about the expense. And a fourth doesn’t want a hen for sustainable reasons (too much plastic, waste and unnecessary travel).

So, if we were starting to see the beginning of the end of the Mega Hen pre-pandemic, it looks like corona has sealed the deal. On behalf of my entire generation (except, perhaps, a few brides-to-be whose Marrakesh month-long mega hens have been scuppered) I say thank God for that.

Life After Lockdown

Gallery

Life After Lockdown in Pictures - Grazia

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New York, USA

The Cafe du Soleil sets up igloos outside for its diners to allow for social distancing.

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Catania, Italy

Sara, who has just given birth to baby Olivia, wears a protective mask as father Angelo takes a picture of his new daughter through a glass wall.

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Paris, France

Students exercise outside as they return to school on 15 May.

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Krakow, Poland

A dental hygienist wearing PPE welcomes patient at a dentist's office in Krakow on 15 May.

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New York, New York, USA

Social distancing circles are used at Domino Park in Brooklyn, New York on 15 May.

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Johannesburg, South Africa

Social distancing markers are displayed at a train station in Johannesburg, South Africa on 4 May.

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Auckland, New Zealand

Martyn Weatherill, principal of Laingholm Primary School in Auckland, hosts an online assembly with students in their classrooms on the first day back to school on 18 May.

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Berlin, Germany

Bayern Munich substitutes wear protective face masks and maintain social distance in the stands during the Bundesliga match between 1. FC Union Berlin and FC Bayern Muenchen at Stadion An der Alten Foersterei on 17 May. The Bundesliga and Second Bundesliga is the first professional league to resume the season after the nationwide lockdown; all matches until the end of the season will be played behind closed doors.

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Dallas, Texas, USA

A sink in a public toilet is blocked off in an attempt to promote social distancing.

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London, UK

An empty Waterloo station shows a sign encouraging social distancing on 18 May.

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San Francisco, California, USA

A temporary tent encampment for the homeless with tents at an acceptable distance from each other is opened in San Francisco.

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Berlin, Germany

Markings are placed on the floor at a primary school in Berlin as primary school pupils and tenth graders began returning to school.

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Krakow, Poland

A sign at the entrance to the Manggha Museum of Japanese Art and Technology in Krakow reads, 'Do Not Enter Without A Mask' and 'Keep A Safe Distance.'

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Paris, France

Gare de nord station in Paris has marks on the ground to show the appropriate social distance between people.

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Granada, Spain

A zebra crossing sports a sign that recommends keeping two meters away from other people on the first day that Granada begins Phase 1 of progressive return to normal life on 18 May.

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Alimos, Greece

Beachgoers enjoy the sun and sand at Anavisos beach on 16 May as organised beaches are allowed to be reopened in Greece.

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Innsbruck, Austria

Hairdressers wash customer's hair on 2 May 2020 in Innsbruck, Austria after hair salons and barber shops reopen after a seven-week lockdown. Customers and employees must wear masks and have to keep as much distance as possible.

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Tel Aviv, Israel

A young girl wearing a mask plays on the playground during the first day of school on 5 May 2020 after over a month and a half that schools were closed.

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Hermosillo, Mexico

A doctor from the state health sector speaks to a federal police officer who is supervising the information to prevent contagion amid the COVID-19 pandemic at Hermosillo International Airport on 2 May 2020. Hermosillo International Airport is operating normally while taking preventive measures to curb the spread of COVID-19.

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Venice, Italy

Demonstrators in Venice asks for the restrictions around bars, restaurants and other commercial activities be lifted on 4 May 2020.

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Shanghai, China

Shanghai Disneyland utilises 'social Distancing' queues for its reopening on 4 May 2020.

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Dusseldorf, Germany

Janine Scholz and Philip Scholz are married in a wedding ceremony at the Autokino Dusseldorf drive-in cinema on 5 May 2020. A total of three couples are marrying at the drive-in with friends and family members allowed to attend in their cars.

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Munich, Germany

Churchgoers arrive Frauenkirche 'Cathedral of Our Lady' cathedral for evening mass on the first day churches and other houses of worship are allowed to hold services again in Bavaria since March on 4 May 2020.

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Dresden, Germany

Visitors, only some of whom are wearing face masks, wait to enter the Zwinger palace complex as a poster showing Adam and Eve wearing masks hangs at the entrance on the first day the palace reopened to the public.

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Athens, Greece

A commuters, wearing protective face masks, sits on a bus on 4 May 2020.

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Barcelona, Spain

People watch the sunset at La Barceloneta Beach on 2 May 2020. In Spain, lockdown measures have continued to ease and walking with family members and outdoor exercise is now permitted from 6-10am and from 8-11pm.

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Tel Aviv, Isreal

Year 3 children return to school for the fist time in over a month and a half on 5 May 2020 in Tel Aviv, Israel.

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Huntington Village, New York, USA

A family receives a delivery of beer from the Six Harbors Brewery, who have trained their two golden retrievers, Buddy and Barley, to deliver beer to customers during the pandemic.

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Miami, Florida

Jose Morales sanitizes buckets of golf balls at the Miami Beach Golf Club on 29 April 2020 as the city of Miami Beach partially reopens parks and facilities including golf courses, tennis courts and marinas.

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Sydney, Australia

Surfers prepare to enter the water at Bondi Beach on 3 May 2020. Currently, 'Surf & Go' measures are in place for weekends and there is no beach access allowed except along designated pathways to the water for surfcraft use only.

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Wuhan, China

People wear protective masks while practicing dance near the Yangtze River 1 May 2020 as life returns to normal in Wuhan, China.

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Las Vegas, Nevada, USA

Prototype clear acrylic safety shield dividers are tested at a blackjack table at the El Cortez Hotel & Casino, which is currently closed as a result of the statewide shutdown.

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Gold Coast, Australia

From 2 May 2020, the Queensland government eased lockdown measures to allow people to leave their homes for recreational activities, such as motorbiking or boating, picnics, visiting national parks or going shopping for non-essential items. Social distancing must still be observed and people must stay within 50km of their main residence.

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Miami Florida

Miami Beach, Florida has partially reopened parks and facilities including golf courses, tennis courts and marinas as it begins easing lockdown restrictions.

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Naples, Italy

A woman has her temperature taken upon arrival at Naples' Central Station 4 May 4 2020.

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Auckland, New Zealand

As schools prepare for students up to Year 10 who can't study from home or whose parents need to return to work to return to school, a teacher write Covid-19 instructions on the white board.

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Miami, Florida

People share alcohol-based hand sanitszer in South Pointe Park on 29 April 2020.

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Vienna, Austria

Shoppers rush into a clothing store, which has opened for the first time since the government imposed restrictions to slow the spread of coronavirus on 2 May 2020.

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Amsterdam, The Netherlands

Restaurant Mediamatic in Amsterdam offers what they call 'corona-proof' dining.

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Bangkok, Thailand

A taxi driver tries to protect himself with a plastic shield after Thailand's lockdown was partially lifted on 3 May 2020 allowing markets, parks, barber shops and restaurants to open with proper social distancing measures.

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Taipei, Taiwan

Students eat their lunch on desks with plastic partitions as a preventive measure at Dajia Elementary School in Taipei on 29 April 2020.

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Moscow, Russia

A couple has their temperature taken before their wedding ceremony at Moscow's No1 Civil Registry Office on the first Sunday after Orthodox Easter.

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Moscow, Russia

The couple shows off their wedding rings to a phone, as currently, relatives and friends are not allowed to attend marriage ceremonies due to safety measures aimed at countering the spread of the disease.

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Milan, Italy

As the lockdown ends in Italy, the government has allowed bars and restaurants to reopen exclusively for take-away food.

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Krakow, Poland

A kiosk worker wears a protective face mask as he speaks to a customer from inside an electronic point covered with plastic inside Kazimierz Shopping mall on 4 May 2020.

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Atlanta, Georgia, USA

Surin Nguyen, wearing protection gear, works on the nails of a customer at Allure Nail Bar in Atlanta, Georgia on 21 April 2020 after Governor Brian Kemp eased restrictions allowing some businesses, including hair and nail salons, to reopen in the US state of Georgia after a four-week lockdown.

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Bozeman, Montana, USA

Kurt Smith wears a mask while helping a customer at the recently reopened Schnee's Boots, Shoes and Outdoors on 4 May 2020.

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