I am a Christmas paradox. I love it so much that I almost manage to ruin it for myself with the self imposed pressure for perfection (and sometimes those around me whom I force my CHRISTMAS CHEER onto with no mercy). This year is no exception, in fact it holds more weight than most because it is my new baby’s first Christmas. Our first sentimental occasion as a family of four. A joyous full stop at the end of our family-making mission, because Christmas also holds extra emotional significance for those, like me, who may have seen more than their fair share of sadder ones.
We eventually had our two children through surrogacy, and throughout all our years of trying and failing, Christmas tended to represent a fairy-lit conclusion of yet another year we didn’t get to spend with the child we had dreamed of spending it with. It was an accumulative time stamp, a full stop on our failure.
My preoccupation with beating Christmas sorrow turned into overcompensation, the desperate quest foto reclaim festive joy, and I know I am not the only one. ‘Christmas Overwhelm’ is a well used phrase by now, and it very accurately describes the extra-ness of the occasion. The extra socialising, extra indulging, extra calendar-keeping and gift-buying and tradition-making and decorating, eating, drinking, spending, list-making, practical thinking and and guess what. It didn’t stop when the longed for family came. Now Christmas is about making the magic happen for everyone else, with jingle bells on, and this year I started even before December did.
The result is somewhere between exaltation and exhaustion. My mum asked me what I’d like for Christmas this year and I realise I hadn’t made time or space to think about that. What I’d wanted for so long I finally have this year; a full family to share the twinkling loveliness with. I think I can already consider my Christmas re-claimed. But if we’re talking things, then yes, what I’d really like is a lie in, a quiet room with a cocktail and a tin of quality street, plus any of the below, thank you. If you’re feeling any degree of Christmas Overwhelm for any reason including but not restricted to the above, then this is a gift list for you, plus some things to get you through. I’m just going to leave this tab open in an inconspicuous place in case anyone should happen to be wondering…
otiumberg.com
This was the year of the earring charm. A new addition to your jewellery collection that is low commitment but high impact. I adore the sweet sentimentality of these initial charms, and the simple aesthetic that manages not to be too whimsy, the perfect ode to my miraculous daughters.
www.net-a-porter.com
It’s one of the first things to go when you have a young family. Drinking hot drinks while they’re actually still hot. This is the kind of indulgent gift I’d never buy for myself, but it makes hot-beverage-drinking a sense of occasion. Something that deserves to be savored, with full focus. Maybe outside, away from all other people. What, feed the kids? Oh I can’t, I HAVE to take my Anya Hindmarch keepy-cup on a long walk, there’s no point using it at home.
beaire.com
You know that lie in I mentioned? Can I swap it out for this? The most welcome gentle (temporary of course) retreat from motherhood I can imagine. Being immersed underground in the most beautiful calming thermal baths, with a massage thrown in for good measure. Heaven.
www.diptyqueparis.com
A nostalgic throwback from my childhood, but now the grown up berry-scented upgrade that will (hopefully) fit all my candles once I’ve burned this one, and will also delight my kids so really it’s excellent value for money and one for the whole family.
binibamba.com
I got these when my first baby was born over three years ago and I have literally just worn them through so there is big-toe hole. Nevermind,, a good reason to upgrade to a personalised pair this year. I’d love my daughters initials in case anyone is interested….
lockdown-liquor.com
I want this latest addition to the LL line up for the beautiful bottle as much as the coffee tequila it houses. A great seasonal drink to offer friends (I’ll think about it), a treat to get me through pre-Christmas panic and post-Christmas blues, then a gorgeous vessel to keep on the bar/repurpose as a candle holder, the list goes on.
www.selfridges.com
Despite over two decades working in the beauty industry I still get excited about an excellent lipstick. Believe the hype, this is colour-pop perfection. The kind of keep-for-best red that will make me feel special in about 3 seconds. I’m all about easy effort these days.
www.qualitystreet.co.uk
I was not joking about the Quality Street. A tin that you can fill yourself is making my hit list for two reasons other than the obvious. One, you can personalise the lid - a gorgeous gift idea from the kids (are you listening husband?). And two, I just read that this year, drumroll please, they are bringing back coffee creams. A divisive decision I know, but my petition finally influenced the Nestle agenda. You’re welcome UK ;-)
www.libertylondon.com
I work at Liberty now and I still covet every new brilliantly curated beauty kit, but I feel like the sleep kit was made for me at this time of year. The mini Liberty print hot water bottle! The Neom Perfect nights sleep candle, the fact that it’s worth £216 but only costs £70, it’s a no-brainer.
www.glassette.com
There it nothing nicer than retreating inside from the cold in deepest winter, and I love an old fashioned hottie-bottie as much as the next person. Dress it in a polo neck that I would happily add to my own wardrobe and it is me-gift-perfection.
To Get You Through: Gift ideas for little people that are actually gifts for you.
uk.yotoplay.com
We have the Yoto player, it is quite brilliant. No screen, short daily educational radio shows, my three year old adores it and I’ve filled her advent calendar with new cards that pay her favourite songs or stories (she bounces out of bed every day to open them). I need the mini for portability purposes. Plane rides, car rides, any time we leave the house ever basically.
www.ergopouch.co.uk
No parent should be without a white noise machine. This one also has pink and brown noise, plus a night light plus a 48 hour battery to be taken anywhere, so I think all in all the perfect size to fill the toe of my stocking I’d say.
eu.dockatot.com
Before Dockatot there was no such thing as a beautiful nursing pillow. This is the perfect shape to wedge the baby in place while she’s practicing sitting up/while I do anything at all where I need both of my hands. Then post bedtime it just looks gorgeous with the rest of my boucle decor. Genius gift.
www.libertylondon.com
I was obsessed with these when I was little. Are they still a thing? Who cares, this is a total collectors item. Haven’t decided yet if I’ll let the kids at it…
babymori.com
I think I get as much pleasure from an adorable teddy as my kid does. This one is top of my list, a responsive humming, glowing sweet sweet bear with a smart cry sensor that plays pink noise to get them back to sleep. Ahhh.
tonies.com
Another audio box option that works wonders in our house at fussy meal times. I’d quite like the night light for both of us - it plays calming melodies for ninety minutes with a warm glow, great for solo bedtimes when I’m putting both down at once.