If you came looking for a forensic investigation into the minutiae of what all the tracks on Ariana Grande's new album mean then congratulations, you've come to the right place.
The singer dropped the tracklist for her new album on Instagram last night, and with songs called things like Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored and Ghostin' we're all just sat here in collective disbelief like 'Ari, how did you know?' (We can only assume that she is somehow listening into a million Whatsapp conversations).
The album, which is officially dropping on the 8th of February, is rapidly shaping up to be the soundtrack, the mood and dare I say it: the essence of our 2019. We already know the meaning's behind the two songs Ariana's released so far - Thank U, Next (If Helen of Troy's face sunk a thousand ships, this song was the death knell for a thousand relationships on the rocks) and 7 rings. But what about the other 10 songs?
Who is Ariana ghosting? Who is she fake smiling at? but most importantly whose relationship is Ariana Grande planning on homewrecking in 2019? This of course calls for a thorough investigation for us to occupy ourselves with before the album hits our Spotify and stays there, on repeat, for sixth months.
1. Break Up With Your Girlfriend, I'm Bored: The One Which We Think Might Be About Big Sean
Let's start with the people's favourite as voted by the internet, for the obvious reason that the title has outlined specifically how we are going to ruin our lives in 2019. Fans have already started speculating that the song might be about Ariana's ex Big Sean who she indicated could 'still get it' in the caption next to his picture in Thank U, Next.
But officially we have no lyrics, no video, no clue as to what it might be about which makes us want it even more. Is it an ode to the new era of the single woman? A shameless burn of girl code? Who knows, but as you would expect, Twitter has plenty to say about it
2. NASA: The One About Outer Space (???)
The category of people who spend waytoomuchtimereadingintocelebrelationships (a noble pursuit) think this could be a reference to the NASA shirt worn by Ariana’s ex Pete Davidsonwhen they made their first official appearance as a couple. But Ariana’s skipped around these rumours stating that it's 'kind of' about outer space. Sure Ari....sure.
3. Needy: The One That Validates Every One Of Our Toxic Relationship Behaviors In 2019
We actually have a pretty good idea of what this song might cover because Ariana posted a 45 second snippet of it to her Instagram October. In it she sings “I can be needy, so hard to please me” which we're taking as Ariana saying she is fully aware that she can be contradictory and needs permanent attention. Like, ermm, all of us really. Take this as your permission to update your Bumble bio to “needy” immediately.
4. Bloodline: The One About Nonna Grande (We Hope)
Nothing’s been released on this yet but there’s speculation that Bloodline is about Ariana’s close relationship to the women in her family. Could this end up being her Chaka Khan I'm Every Woman moment? (Yes please).
5. In My Head: The One About Mental Health
This is Ariana’s grandma (Nonna Grande’s) favourite song from the album which is the cutest thing ever. But it could also be Ariana’s way of speaking about her mental health. It's no secret that she's been through a lot. A year and a half ago a bombing took place in Grande’s concert at the Manchester Arena during her Dangerous Woman tour, killing 22 people.
The event profoundly affected Ariana who had pre-existing struggles with anxiety and she didn't speak for two days. In a BBC interview three months ago discussing her anxiety she said “It’s just in your head and it’s just so crazy how powerful it is.”
6. Imagine: The One About Annoying Social Media Relationships
With lyrics like ‘click click post’ we’re feeling like Imagine taps into the culture of social media fakery in relationships (read: that couple who ‘reveal’ their every microwaved lasagna on Instagram), it has a bluesy vibe and describes a utopian relationship ordering takeaways and wearing no make up underscored by couples Instagram updates.
But in a cryptic Instagram story about the song Ariana confirmed this relationship that doesn’t look like it seems "For those of you asking about imagine” she wrote “i would say if ‘thank u, next’ = acceptance… ‘imagine’ = denial. hope that makes sense."
7. Make Up: The One In Which Ari Shares Details For Her Eyelash Technician
Ok, so nothing’s been released on Make Up. But I’ve included it anyway, because if I for one don’t get a musical tutorial into how Ariana Grande does her eyeliner flick and where she get’s her lashes done then I will feel cheated and betrayed by this song and this entire album.