Forget single girl summer, cuffing season is well and truly upon us - just ask Taylor Swift.
After weeks of speculation, the singer seemingly confirmed her relationship with Travis Kelce this week, when she was spotted cheering him on at the NFL player's Kansas City Chiefs game at Arrowhead Stadium. One day later, she packed on the PDA with Kelce at a private party in Kanas. So far, so cute.
But her blossoming romance comes with a word of warning from Kelce’s ex-girlfriend Maya Benberry. In an interview with The Daily Mail, Benberry warned Swift ‘once a cheater always a cheater,’ adding ‘Taylor seems like such a fun girl with a beautiful spirit so I wish her the best of luck but I wouldn’t be a girls’ girl if I didn’t advise her to be smart. I’m sure by now she has mastered the ability to see who is really there for her - and who is just using her.’
Benberry and Kelce first met when she was a contestant on his 2016 E! dating show, Catching Kelce. Kelce went on dates with 50 women from different US states and ultimately chose Benberry as the winner. While Kelce hasn't responded to these claims, sources told TMZ that they're false - saying that Kelce and Benberry only dated for a month, that Kelce never cheated, and that they didn't announce the breakup because of their TV contract.
Regardless of whether the rumours are true, this begs the question – is it ever your job to tell your ex's new partner about their past infidelities?
Let's start by tackling that age-old phrase - once a cheat, always a cheat. The debate reared its head earlier this year when Love Island’s Jess Harding declared the phrase during a game of Never Have I Ever, after Zachariah Noble admitted to cheating on two of his previous partners when he was younger. The numbers agree: one 2017 study found that those who had cheated in the past were three times more likely to cheat again compared to those who had never dabbled in adultery. However, it's worth noting that studies on cheating are notoriously tricky to conduct because they rely on honesty, and not many people want to own up to such brazen disrespect.
If we take the phrase at face value, the rules of Girl Code - which Benberry seemingly refers to - suggest relaying past infidelities is the right thing to do. But not so fast. Tarnishing all cheaters with the same brush isn't fair - or accurate. Some people will cheat again, that’s life. But let’s not forget the people who move on from their past actions and commit to their future relationships. Even if you have good intentions for your ex's new relationship (more on this in a minute), your warning might cause more pain than if you had just kept schtum.
Then, if we're being truly honest with ourselves, there's always the chance that our actions aren't as well intentioned as we first thought (hell hath no fury like a scorned ex, etc). If you are thinking of relaying past infidelities, stop and ask yourself: what is the motivation behind this? If a desire to seek revenge on your ex is top of the list, it’s probably best not to follow through. If you want your ex back, also hold fire - forming an alliance with their new partner is not the way to go about it. At the very least, interfering in your ex's new relationship will make you look bitter and no one wants that.
For an extra opinion, we put the question to dating expert Sarah Louise Ryan, who confirmed it’s best not to meddle in your partner’s new relationship. ‘If either you and your ex have moved on, then new relationships are not yours or theirs. If a line has been drawn in your relationship, then it’s important to consider why you are investing time and energy into their new relationship - what’s the intention?’ she says. ‘People change, grow and evolve. A relational exit such as infidelity whilst present in one relationship may not be a certainty in another.’
So, in short, it's not your job to relay infidelities from previous relationships. The past is the past, and it's best to keep it that way. And as for Swift? We have everything crossed for her new romance with Kelce, but if the worst does happen, at least we can count on her to have a revenge anthem at the ready.