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The Church Of England Has Issued Some Advice For Football Fans

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Imagine this: you’re stood at the altar in the most beautiful dress you’ve ever worn, your soon-to-be husband is staring into your eyes, vowing ‘I solemnly swear to love and to cherish, to have and to…’ until suddenly, ‘ARGH REF WHAT ARE YOU PLAYING AT?!’ comes screaming from the third pew. It’s your uncle Joe, and he’s just ruined the most romantic moment of your life.

This is the nightmare every engaged woman in England, and most likely Sweden, has been having since Eric Dier brought football home and scored the winning penalty during the England vs Colombia match on Tuesday night. Because, for those fateful couples getting married on Saturday afternoon, they’re wedding now clashes with the World Cup quarter finals where England play Sweden, aka our biggest football game in 28 years.

In fact, it’s such a big deal that the Church of England has had to weigh in and has issued a warning against wedding guests to turn their phone off so as to avoid temptation for checking the score mid-ceremony. That’s right, the Church of England really does not trust your uncle Joe not to instinctively scream out mid-vows when catching a glimpse of the latest score.

‘For those attending a wedding service at 3pm,’, said Revd. Sandra Millar, head of life events at the Church of England, ‘I’d strongly encourage you to make sure you are fully on-side with the happy couple and switch off your mobile phone in advance.’

Full of football references, the Revd. went on to say that sneaking a look at the score while in church should warrant a red card, but don’t you worry football fans, if you do it at the reception, one of Gods very own mouthpieces has confirmed, you ‘may be forgiven’.

Honestly, we’re more on side with the football fans than we are the marrying couple here. If we’ve already been forced to spend hundreds celebrating someone else’s decision to become liable for each others debt, ahem I mean love, then we believe we’re expecting a projector screening of the match somewhere during the reception...

Click though to find out all of the best places to watch the World Cup this weekend...