The Reaction To Curtis Pritchard ‘Coming Out’ Is Not Okay

This week, in an interview with The Sun, Love Island’s Curtis Pritchardwas asked about his sexuality after weeks of speculation ran rampant online. ‘I’ve been with women and I’m with a woman now. You can never put a label on anything,’ he told the publication, ‘It’s a cliché to say, but love is blind. I can never ever say what will happen in the future… I wouldn’t rule anything out.’

Subsequently, despite explicitly saying he would never label himself, he has been labelled ‘bisexual’ by the media, and ‘gay’ by online commentators. Media outlets have scoured the internet for pictures of him with famous men, implied Maura is leaving him because of his sexuality and on Good Morning Britain this morning he was essentially interrogated as interviewers badgered him to confirm whether he is or isn't bisexual (skip to four minutes in the below video if you want to watch the uncomfortable questioning for yourself). Unsurprisingly, on social media, the commentary only gets worse.

But let’s get one thing straight (pun unintended): Curtis Pritchard has not ‘come out’ as bisexual, gay, queer or any other LGBT+ term. What he has done, is the classic Gen Z/young millennial move of never denying that he might not be straight. And while some use that as a passive tool to come out to family and friends in an informal way (read: me, lol) that does not mean others can explicitly label him with a term he himself has never used.

More than that, it doesn’t mean that everyone and their dog can start asking his family, friends and romantic partners how they feel about it. Because, frankly, it’s irrelevant. The very fact that Maura Higgins has been asked to comment on his sexuality says a lot, because there is an underlying assumption – fuelled by decades of biphobia (hi, Sex and The City)- that men who are attracted men as well as women are no longer attractive to women, and so it must be a problem for her.

Biphobia is real, and it is deeply engrained in how we inform our actions towards others. In fact, it exists in its own special pocket of homophobia because it is also rampant within the LGBT+ community. Personally, I have only ever experienced explicit homophobia from gay women whom – often as a result of their own horrible experiences– assume that bisexual women view lesbianism as a stopover on an experimental journey that sees them end up with men anyway.

I have, of course, experienced implicit homophobia from men whom fetishize bisexuality and light up with desire when it’s dropped into conversation. But that speaks to the same problem, because they don’t see it as a threat to whether they can ultimately ‘win’ you as a woman. And maybe if they did, bisexual women would be treated with the same vitriol as lesbian women are.

Essentially, the problem is a widespread assumption that bisexual women and men are actually all just confused. It’s why many are now labelling Curtis ‘gay’, and assuming he cannot possibly be attracted to Maura, baiting her to be angry about something that is completely irrelevant to how he feels about her.

Watch: Amy Hart on the things you only know if you've been on Love Island

Ultimately, it’s no one’s business – and it’s boring that he was even asked the question. In fact, one of the strongest responses online– in a pleasant surprise – was ‘who cares?’. And they’re right. While it’s important for queer people to have the space to be open and public and loud about their experiences of the world, someone ‘coming out’ shouldn’t be big news – especially when they haven’t even done that themselves.

So stop asking Curtis about something he clearly doesn’t want to talk about, stop asking his friends how it impacts them, and stop assuming you know anything about his sexuality from a vague cryptic quote. All this does is ‘other’ queer people watching even more than they already are, and centres heteronormative ideas to a conversation that they shouldn’t be involved in.

More than that, the people asking these questions and commentating online are then validated in the very homophobia that informs their ideas of bisexuality. Until Curtis speaks, maybe it’s time the rest of us stop.

Read more: Who was the most popular Love Island contestant, according to Instagram?