Married At First Sight: Claiming Tayah Is ‘Filling A Void’ After Miscarriage Is As Misogynistic As It Is Cruel

Addressing the remarks, Tayah asked: “How is this acceptable?”

Tayah

by Natasha Preskey |
Updated on

Since day one, Tayah and Adam have been the best advertisement for the Married At First Sight experts’ (sometimes questionable) matching abilities. The pair have spent 90% of the series staring at each other, gooey eyed, and even dropped the ‘L-bomb’ on their honeymoon, just days after meeting.

In the preview for tonight’s episode, Tayah is heard telling the other couples: “We are expecting”, leaving even unshockable therapist Mel Schilling (originally from the programme’s high-drama Australian version) open-mouthed. But, if the couple are already expecting a baby, it will likely come as little surprise to viewers, as 25-year-old Tayah has consistently expressed her desire to become a mother since episode one.

The estate agent has also been open about the fact she suffered a miscarriage with a previous partner, something which husband Adam has been supportive and compassionate about from the beginning. Viewers have praised Tayah’s bravery after she spoke openly about how this tragic experience has shaped and affected her.

Tayah herself has expressed her hope that speaking out about miscarriage could help other women in the same position. After her first episode of MAFS aired, she shared a picture of her and Adam on Instagram, writing: "So here he is…. My new husband... tonight’s episode was a tough one to watch in parts, my miscarriage hasn’t been something I have spoken about to many people and still find difficult in a sense to speak about, however I hope speaking about this subject brings to light the awareness it really needs.

"My family, also, are the most amazing, supportive family in the world and I’m the luckiest person alive to have them. I’m so excited for everyone to see the journeys of myself and Adam and the rest of the couples throughout this process."

READ MORE: Married At First Sight UK: Why Franky Labelling Himself An ‘Alpha’ Is Problematic.

However, not everyone has been supportive of the reality star and, during her time on the programme, Tayah has been forced to confront cruel comments from the public, including trolls suggesting she’s “not over her miscarriage” and is rushing into having a baby with Adam to “fill that void”. Addressing the remarks, Tayah asked: “How is this acceptable?”

Sadly, these comments are the inevitable result of a woman in the public eye failing to occupy the miniscule space between not having a sufficient interest in babies (read: heartless and selfish) and being too keen to procreate (desperate and shrewish).

An adult woman making plans - with her adult husband - to have children should not be eyed with scrutiny, and to suggest that Tayah is unable to make a rational decision to start a family after experiencing a miscarriage denies her agency.

READ MORE: Married At First Sight: Amy Deserves Better Than To Be Paired With Josh

Representations of happiness after pregnancy loss - and of women discussing their experiences of miscarriage without shame - can help other women with their own pain. If Tayah can’t share her past without having it cruelly used against her, this will only serve to discourage other women from speaking out.

Concern trolling like this is a form of ‘benevolent sexism’ and, just like more overtly misogynistic comments, it limits and punishes women like Tayah, who are unashamed of their experiences and open about what they want.

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