Theresa May Burst In On A Couple Having Sex While She Was Campaigning

Theresa May Burst In On A Couple Having Sex While She Was Campaigning

by Georgia Aspinall |
Published on

Theresa May has been having some banter with the lads, or 250 high-brow guests at the Westminster Correspondents’ dinner, and revealed herself to be an accidental voyeur. In a speech to political journalists and senior ministers, she recalled canvassing during the election last year citing one particular occasions that ‘sticks in the memory’.

In a surprisingly honest speech, she said:

‘I was at the open door of a caravan and there was clearly some activity within, so I duly knocked. No answer — but the activity persisted.

‘It looked like there was someone lying down. I knocked again, and put my head around the door. There was someone lying down … In fact, two people were lying down.

‘And it wasn’t a good time to ask them if they were going to vote Conservative … They were giving a whole new meaning to the phrase ‘deep and special partnership.’

Deep and special partnership? TOO MUCH INFORMATION THERESA.

She continued riding the banter wave by adding, ‘I’m used to hearing moans on the doorstep, but this was something else.’

Honestly, the thing that concerns us most here isn’t just the fact Theresa May is now someone we want to have banter with, it’s that she casually pops her head round people’s doors while she’s canvassing? Can you imagine sitting on your couch ignoring the door, trying to avoid a politician’s doorstop campaign, and Theresa May’s head just appears out of nowhere? No one needs that kind of fright.

Theresa’s comedy rodeo went on to address her ministers, which is relatively awkward since she’s been accused of losing control of them in the past few months, where she made jokes comparing them all to different apps. Of Boris Johnson, she joked that if he were a phone app it would carry the warning ‘contains adult content’, while also saying Philip Hammond was ‘like a drier, less frivolous version of LinkedIn’.

Her own app however, would provide ‘provides GPS directions to your nearest wheat field … real-time tracking of Priti Patel’s air travel … and the instant allocation of all household chores into girl jobs and boy jobs.’

Omg lol, remember that time you enforced gender stereotypes on live TV, what a laugh!

She even went after her predecessor David Cameron, saying ‘The weather has been so bad in West Oxfordshire that sadly David couldn’t make it in. He’s snowed into his wheelie-shed.’


Well, it’s nice to see she’s having such a laugh, Brexit might be falling apart and she may be losing control of her entire cabinet, but at least she’s got her sense of humour…

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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