For millennials, most of our teenage years were spent in a friends bedroom, an odour of Impulse body spray filling the room, walls covered by N Sync posters as Britney and Christina play on the radio. Someone in the corner lathering Dream Matte mousse on their face while another sorts through your 100-strong DVD collection hoping to find a boxset of The OC series one to binge all evening. Kate Moss was the beauty standard, every billboard told us so. And, with the popularity of MTV reality shows like The Simple Life or The Girls Next Door (where the payoff was ‘Ha! Look at these Bimbos!’), tabloids filling their pages with unfavourable paparazzi shots accompanied by cruel headlines, and celebrity hosts like Howard Stern turning slut-shaming into entertainment, pop culture could be summed up by sex and sexism. MeToo couldn’t come soon enough…
It was difficult for teen girls in its own way, but how does it compare to the challenges facing teens today? You hear the stories, you read the stats: young people have never been more depressed, anxious and lonely. Consumed by addictive algorithms, exploited by Big Tech, they’re growing up through screens where face filters and editing are commonplace. They’re becoming influencers or being influenced themselves – some falling down scary rabbit holes of inceldom, anorexia or self-harm. We sit, watch and worry, but what do teens themselves understand about this era of their lives? As we mark International Day of The Girl, the theme for which is ‘Girls vision for the future’ this year, we must ask – what does it mean to be a girl today?
Ava, 15, West Yorkshire: 'The biggest insecurity for girls my age is our weight'
Ava's dream is to become a pilot; she takes flying lessons and does acting and modelling in her spare time. ‘In 10 years’ time, I hope to be financially stable with a good job, have moved out and travelled.’ She recently started going to the gym. ‘Me and my friends criticise ourselves a lot when we don’t need to,’ she says. ‘We’re most insecure about our weight. People strug- gle with their thighs and stomach. I know a few girls at my school have eating disorders.’
When Ava was 13, she experienced this herself. ‘I went through a rough time when I struggled to eat,’ she explains. ‘I think it was caused by [negative] body image and watch- ing people on TikTok whose figures I’d envy, then I’d look at myself and feel unhappy with how I looked. But I’ve changed a lot because of the people I’ve started surrounding myself with. Going to the gym made me feel like I can eat whatever I want as well. I’ve become more comfortable about my body now.’
Recently, social media apps have started to flag when a person is using a filter, or when an image has been edited. ‘If an influencer is editing themselves then it’s like we should do that too because if they’re not happy with themselves, they must think we look bad too. I don’t think editing should happen at all,’ she says. ‘Social media is a good way to know what’s going on, but sometimes, I think life would be better if there wasn’t any at all.’
Natalie, 16, Birmingham: 'Boys are influenced by men like Andrew Tate'
Natalie loves performing arts, hoping to one day get into acting, and in her free time she writes lyrics and reads. Her biggest worry? ‘Boys my age being easily influenced by men like Andrew Tate,’ she says. ‘It’s really harmful because he promotes this idea that women are objects and men are superior. I have heard boys say things that are degrading towards women, and it does create a divide between boys and girls – it feels dangerous to me, like an unsafe environment, not neces- sarily physically but the expectations they have of women because of those beliefs.’
Natalie says her school has tried to address the sexist behaviour of boys, but has not done enough. ‘Issues like this around gender are pushed to the side, they focus more on racism and LGTBQ+ issues, which is good, of course, but it feels like they’re forgetting about equality between males and females.’ They do, however, get taught about consent and healthy relationships, but, she adds, ‘It’s whether people are actually taking it in.’
And in 10 years’ time? ‘I hope to be living in a different country, somewhere warmer! And hopefully engaged or married.’
Temi, 15, Peterborough: 'People feel if they don't look a certain way, they won't be loved'
like 57% of her generation, Temi wants to be a content creator. She’s hoping to secure a BBC apprenticeship to learn about radio media, but would like to follow in the foot- steps of her favourite YouTuber, Nella Rose. ‘In 10 years’ time, I hope to be investing in my first house, successful in social media and bringing positivity to people’s lives,’ she says.
Temi got her first smartphone at 11 and consumes more than she creates, which im- pacts her mental health. ‘If I’m going through a bit of a [bad] time, I’ll just be sat at home constantly on my phone and it puts me in a place where I’m not motivated to do anything because I just want to be on social media. I’ve experienced bullying online a few times.’
When Temi started year 10, her mental health took a hit. ‘I used to have lots of panic attacks at school caused by anxiety. I’ve seen people struggling with that and eating disor- ders. Girls my age feel like they have to look a certain way to fit into society’s standards.’ The body standard for girls her age is to be slim but curvy, she explains. ‘In a lot of songs and raps, people say they would rather have a curvy or “slim thick” girl.’
Does that impact the way girls her age tend to view themselves? ‘A lot of girls my age hate themselves. People seem to feel if they don’t look a certain way, they’re not going to be loved.’
Alyssia, 17, London: 'I proudly call myself a feminist'
Gen z has been dubbed the ‘activism gen- eration’ and Alyssia hopes to pursue a career in law. ‘There’s just so much to change,’ she says. ‘I’m inspired by causes like racial bias, institutional discrimination and the environ- ment.’ She’s also a proud feminist. ‘There’s a lot of negative stigma that I don’t really understand; it’s about empowering women, so why would you not be a feminist?’
Alyssia worries about the influence of Andrew Tate. ‘[Sexism] is really normalised, I know a lot of people who’d say they’re Tate supporters and repost his videos. It’s uncom- fortable and sad, because it’s boys you’re friends with at school, but you don’t want to associate with them if they talk like that.’
Experts have also warned of the increased normalisation of rough sex through exposure to porn. ‘Girls definitely feel pressure; [you’re] made to feel like as soon as you’re in a relationship you should be having sex,’ she says. ‘But I’ve also heard a lot of people talk- ing about being celibate.’
There’s also pressure to get ‘tweakments’ underage. ‘Filler is quite common,’ she says. ‘On Insta there are people who offer these treatments [to underage girls], they’re almost as common as lash techs. Some people in my school even went to Turkey to get a nose job.’
Does that impact her self-image? ‘Me and all my friends are self-conscious; body dys- morphia is a big problem due to diet culture. It was never like that when we were younger.’ As for the future? In 10 years’ time she hopes ‘to be a qualified solicitor, have travelled a lot and, since I’ll be 27, maybe be married.’
Minnie, 14, London: 'I wish I didn't get a smartphone so young'
‘I started using social media when I was 11. TikTok and Snapchat are my favourites, I love using them both but there are down- sides,’ says Minnie, who watches cooking, dancing and make-up videos. ‘TikTok espe- cially is quite addictive. I just keep scrolling when I know I should be doing homework. I’ve definitely got a short attention span now. You can find some very inappropriate things online as well. I like having a smart- phonebutIdowishIgotitatanolderageso I wasn’t so easily distracted by it now.’
Minnie’s biggest stress in life currently is her exams – but she also worries about her personal safety. ‘I keep my location on for my parents if I’m out with my friends,’ she says.
She’s hopeful for her future; she plans a career in teaching and wants to marry and have children. ‘In 10 years’ time, I hope to have done well in school, have a successful job and be living in the countryside.’ What would she change about the world if she could? ‘People being racist or homophobic,’ she says. ‘And the wars that are going on; that’s quite stressful.’
Photographer: Jenny Lewis