After returning to work just seven weeks after the birth of her second child, stylist Chloe Forde chats easily with her son Ruben (now three months) balanced on her lap. Multi-tasking isn’t so much a skill as a necessity.
‘Just by the nature of being freelance, I kind of went back to work, on my first shoot, when I think he was seven weeks,’ says Chloe. ‘I also have an online lifestyle brand - I'm really lucky because my business partner, we got pregnant at the same time. So it sort of worked out because we both brought our babies to work really, really early.
‘That all being said, I don't really advocate for that. I think as women, we do this thing of being like, “You're amazing. Oh, my god, you're doing so much. Oh, my god, you're back at work? Well, you're Superman.” And actually, I just think the system is not set up properly - freelancers should be able to take off maternity.’
Instead, Chloe is trying to fit into her busy schedule play and movement, in a bid to build some resilience back into her body. And, like many have discovered, second time around, it’s felt harder.
‘It’s been really different,’ she admits. ‘Obviously, I was four years younger [the first time with daughter, Noah], which I think does make a difference. I had a lot more time. I worked out through my whole pregnancy. Whilst the labour was tricky, I honestly felt like I'd almost trained for it. And actually, I could feel how different body was reacting with Ruben. We were in a pandemic, so all the gyms were closed. It's been really different. I'm really slowly getting back into it now - and I'm really excited about that.’
Chloe has utilised the workout gear many of us stockpiled during the early pandemic days, like ankle and wrist weights and hand-held weights, to fit in exercise where she can. ‘I also want to go swimming,’ she adds. ‘I just think swimming is amazing, because you really have time for yourself, you're underwater. I'm that silly person that's trying to do 100 things at once. Whereas actually, if you swim, you're not ticking off a podcast, you're not voice noting anyone, no one can contact you. So it really is like time for yourself.’
More than ever, with two children now, exercise is helping Chloe find that resilience in her mind, as well as her body. ‘I think in my 20s I really didn't know about that, and I worked out to look a certain way,’ she says. ‘I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I think we should be allowed to say you want to look a certain way in clothes or whatever it is, because that also helps your mental health if it makes you feel good.
‘But since having kids and being in my 30s I definitely think for me moving is about headspace. I use that word quite a lot. I think when you've got so much going on, headspace is really important. And I think I get a lot of that from exercise. It's time for yourself. It feels quite self-indulgent sometimes. But I think we should sort of lean into that and really enjoy it.’
Seeing that side to movement has also helped Chloe see the fun – instead of ‘punishment’ – in movement too” ‘I really like to use the word play, I really like that. And seeing the results. You're like, hang on, I've run XYZ long. And I can do that, or I've lifted this way. I've swam an extra length, or I'm running after my kids. For me, it really builds confidence. And rely on exercise quite a lot for that.’
That said, with all that movement and play is bringing Chloe, she says it’s key that enjoyment is always centred. ‘If you don't feel like it, don't do it - your time is so precious,’ she says. ‘Take your time. But if you’re like, “You know what, I would like some time to myself, I would like to feel stronger, or I would like to lose a bit of weight…” I definitely think you should find the sport that you like, that feels like playing. There's definitely something everybody can find that they like.’
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