Scratchy Zoom Mics And Heavy Breathing – Why Are We So Sensitive To Noise Right Now?

For me, it was the seemingly unbearable scratching of a badly connected Teams call. Words echoed, scratched, went missing, stuck and then repeated – that was the noise that, this morning, finally nearly tipped me over the edge.

I’ve tried to be a level-headed as most of us are managing to be about the worldwide coronavirus pandemic that has upturned all of our lives. I’m very lucky – I’m not a key worker, not alone, have a (currently, touch wood, hello Mr Magpie etc) healthy family, am employed, we have food. I also have a bottle of wine still available. Can I please very clearly here acknowledge my privilege?

But, like many of my friends who are in a similar position to me, we’ve noticed that the feelings, they come in waves – ups and downs, moods and ‘I CAN DO THIS I’M FINE’ highs. And today, after a sleepless night with a toddler, the noise on our daily Teams call was the sound that found me crashing down.

I genuinely almost left the meeting. Almost told everyone else to leave the meeting. I think, because I was seeing red - and it’s not totally clear and my brain was so fuzzed by the schrshhshhshhs noises – I said something along the lines of ‘SORRY BUT CAN EVERYONE HERE THAT FUCKING AWFUL NOISE TOO?’ They could – it was annoying. But they were coping a little better.

Sleepless night in mind, I just presumed I was being a terrible grump (this hasn’t been ruled out), until in my next videocall of the day, someone said, ‘Sorry, I missed that, all I can hear is typing’. A quick chat with others made me realise I wasn’t alone in finding some noises... triggering.

Turns out a few of us are struggling with certain noises – whether it’s our partner talking on a video call while we try and concentrate, the endless pinging of someone else’s email on a Zoom, the annoyance of a bad connection, the neighbours opposite's building works, the upstairs neighbour’s new commitment to 17 HIIT workouts a day, the next-door neighbours' decision to have sex at 5.30am every day (this is a real thing someone told me. 5.30am!)

You should also DEFINITELY watch Gina Martin’s video about the noise of her neighbour constantly watching porn…

Sat here in the kitchen writing this, the house does feel a bit like that children’s book, Peace At Last. The on where the dad bear can’t get to sleep in the bedroom because his wife is snoring, in the spare room because his kid is pretending to be an aeroplane, in the lounge because the clock is ticking, or in the garden because the owl is twit-twooing. Here, the dishwasher is purring, the washing machine churning, there’s no office hub-bub to cover up anyone’s breathing, the baby’s monitor is making that low-level hmmmmmm that it does.

It’s almost like all the anxiousness we’re feeling about everything else is for some of us, adding up to a kind of isolation-induced misophonia. Misophonia is a condition where certain noises can induce an emotional or physiological response. Some sufferers complain of it being like a noise is driving you crazy – it can trigger anger, panic, or make you want to flee. And while I’m not trying to diagnose anyone with a condition that must be seriously hellish for people day-in, day-out, I thought it was worth asking for some advice.

Because, at the very least, it’d be so embarrassing to explain to people that I’d quit my job/smashed all my possessions in a rage about a dripping tap.

‘Surprisingly, isolation has actually helped with my condition as I'm not as exposed to fellow office-based colleagues that chew loudly,’ says misophonia sufferer John. ‘It's an unexpected blessing! I work in a small office and work close to a colleague who for some reason could eat something as basic as buttered bread and yet make a sound comparable to a cement mixer turning whilst filled with sludge.’

Sophie also said that her misophonia is worse in an office, than out of it. But she admits isolation has posed some challenges – especially with building works happening in her block. 'Zoom calls do drive me mad,' she says, 'the sound of people having music in the background, or typing loudly is incredibly frustrating. Oh, and then when people have the Zoom on speaker so then there is a feedback that ends up trilling at a horrible pitch.'

John says the feeling he gets when his misophonia is triggered is ‘the common psychological fight/flight reaction': 'I'm not a confrontational person by any means so for me I need to get away as quickly as I can, otherwise I start fantasising about throwing heavy office equipment at the offending “audible chewer”. It physically riles me, I feel angry and if it gets continuously worse, start feeling almost rage-filled - which is extremely out of character for me.

‘My advice to anyone that is struggling with trigger noises is to acknowledge and respond to the trigger by getting away from the sound as quickly as you can. Bottling up the reaction will only build up the emotion further and may result in an unwanted outburst. Find a different room for a bit, go for that walk or listen to some music. If you're sharing a flat with someone that is an offender, consider talking about your condition in a non-accusing way.’

To be honest, whether it’s a noise or an action or any given situation, that sounds like good advice right now.

READ MORE: LOL, Remember When You Thought You Wanted More Time With Your Kids?

READ MORE: Coronavirus: Does New Research Mean I Should Be Wearing A Face Mask?