Zara McDermott: ‘I’ve Been A Victim Of Revenge Porn Twice – My Anger Fuelled Me To Make This Documentary’

When Zara McDermott was evicted from the Love Island villa in 2018, she was prepared to come back to a different life and hundreds of thousands of new social media followers. But she didn’t expect to return home to news that nude pictures of her had gone viral. Instead, her final day on the show ended with a Love Island PR breaking the news before she flew home. She’d privately sent the pictures to a guy she’d been seeing, who later dumped her before she went into the villa. Now the images were circulating around WhatsApp group chats globally.

‘I'd just gone through the biggest experience of my life. I just wanted to be able to live in the moment and enjoy my new life for a little bit and instead being reminded of actually how awful the world can be sometimes,’ she says. ‘Not only did I have to deal with coming out - I can't even explain how you have to get used to the trolling and online hate and abuse - that's one huge thing that you need to get used to. So having that coupled with the revenge porn experience, it can break a person. It really can.’

This wasn’t the first time Zara, the model, influencer and reality TV star, had experienced revenge porn. When she was 14, during a period of being badly bullied at school in Upminster, Essex, a boy repeatedly pestered her to send him a nude picture. She hadn’t kissed a boy yet and wasn’t sure if this was normal, so eventually – in a desperate attempt to fit in - she took a picture of herself in the bath and sent it to him. The next day at school she realised something was amiss. By lunchtime, it had gone viral. It even circulated around nearby schools. Her reputation at school never recovered and she was known as the ‘slag’ for the rest of her years there. Both times her revenge porn experience was traumatic . At 14, she even contemplated suicide. And after appearing on Love Island, the reach was worldwide.

Her experience after Love Island - when she was 21 - fuelled her to want to make the documentary. 'I think because I was a victim twice,' she says. 'The first time I see it as like you go through processes of grieving. I felt so many emotions the first time, and the second time it happened to me I still felt some of those emotions but the anger came through that time. That anger definitely fuelled me wanting to make this documentary.'

The fact she’s been through this twice goes to show how prevalent the issue is today. Now, her story is the basis of a new BBC documentary about revenge porn, which Zara presents. In it she talks to a number of women who have all experienced different forms of revenge porn. It seeks to warn young women about the dangers of sexting, while reminding viewers the person at fault is not the person who sends the pictures, but the person who shares them without consent. Zara knows this, and yet still feels shame today.

Ahead of the documentary’s release this month, Zara, 24, speaks to me over Zoom from her boyfriend Sam Thompson’s home in West London, where she lives. Sam is a fellow Made In Chelsea star and the pair are recently back together after a high-profile break last year. Watching them today, you’d never guess their split was splashed over the tabloids and a major Made In Chelsea storyline a few months ago.

‘We’re really happy. We’re in a really good place. Our relationship is the best it’s ever been. He’s the best boyfriend in the whole world,’ she beams. She’s not moving out, contrary to rumours that she will move to her own place. Instead, she wants to buy a property, do it up and rent it out as an investment. ‘I’ll always spend a lot of my time here with Sam,’ she says.

She seems cheery, poised and very much at home in his house. Sam can be heard in the background chatting loudly on the phone in the living room while Zara talks from their kitchen table, until she boots him out when she needs to move in there for better WiFi. ‘Can you go upstairs as well because I can hear you and it’s really putting me off,’ she jokes. We don’t hear another peep out of Sam.

She tells me she gets inundated with messages from women reaching out to her to share their own experiences of revenge porn.

‘I have so many women contacting me I can't even begin to tell you how many, it’s sometimes actually frightening,’ she says. It can be as many as 10 to 15 women a day if Zara has been speaking publicly on the topic. Even when she hasn’t spoken out about it for a while, she’ll get a message every couple of days – and this has been ongoing for two and a half years.

‘It makes me really sad. And it also makes me sad that they've come to me. Like, the fact that they've messaged me makes me think, maybe you're finding it hard to speak to your family or your friends. I know sometimes it is easier to open up to a stranger than your family or friends, but it really does highlight the idea of shame,’ she says.

Revenge Porn has been illegal since 2015, but that hasn’t helped to wipe out the crime. In fact, the pandemic has seen a surge in reports of revenge porn, with campaigners saying the problem has been exacerbated by lockdown.

This past year we’ve spent our lives online. Observing people via our screens has replaced real interaction. It makes sense, then, that influencers feel the way we engage with them has intensified. Zara has felt the mood change.

‘If I'm really frank, you can feel the energy online has shifted [because of the pandemic],’ she says.

‘Understandably, people are a lot more short-tempered with anything, honestly anything. Maybe something that I could have posted a year ago that would have made a lot of people laugh now would come with a lot more negativity.’

Has the trolling worsened?

‘100%. A lot worse. It’s nasty messages I would probably never have received about my appearance a year ago,’ she says. ‘The difference between now and this time last year is insane.’

She says influencers need to be a bit indifferent to stand out but she doesn’t dare for fear of being trolled or angering people.

‘Sometimes you need to have opinions on things and talk about them and open up debate. And I think that's the interesting part of being an influencer. However, I personally shy away from doing anything like that because I'm so petrified of upsetting someone,’ she says. ‘I've been nervous after each post ever since I started influencing. That's not changed due to the pandemic or anything like that. I just don't want to ever upset anyone or cause any issues.’

Talking to Sam and her mum and dad on the phone helps, as well as speaking to her friends, nearly all of whom aren’t in the public eye. ‘I would be lying if I said I didn't cry at least probably three times a week from the nasty comments and stuff like that.’ she says.

Another tricky online area to navigate she’s found is the temptation to enhance her face with filters. She’s trying to stop using Instagram face filters now. Good timing really, as this month the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) ruled that influencers aren’t allowed to use beauty filters when they create sponsored posts to sell us skincare or cosmetics products.

‘The problem is, when you start using those face filters and things like that, which, actually, Instagram do show when you use those, but when you use them, you then start to not want to put something up without them. It's not the best. It makes you lose confidence a little bit in yourself. I think for like a year I couldn't put an Instagram story up of my face without a face filter on. Because you get in the habit and you think, Oh God, I look so much nicer with that filter on. I don't want to take it off,’ she says.

When it comes to the intriguing world of influencing Zara isn’t sure how many ad deals she’s offered as it all goes through her management. How about how much she makes from Instagram? ‘Oh I can’t say that’ she laughs.

Regardless, she’s certainly trying to use her enormous platform for good and hopes her documentary will be shared in schools, colleges and shown in PSHE lessons, as well as used by parents as a way to broach the subject with their children, so no one has to go through what she has.

‘One thing I say [to every person who gets in touch about revenge porn] is nothing stays the same for long and it does get better, even though you might feel like you're in the darkest place ever, it does get better.’

Zara McDermott: Revenge Porn will be on BBC Three on iPlayer from Tuesday 23 February.

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