The Enduring Allure Of Pete Wicks

Guys, I have a confession to make: I really, really fancy Pete Wicks. It probably doesn’t need to be a confession, countless women seem to, but admitting that on a Zoom with my colleagues this morning and seeing the raised eyebrows in response, it definitely feels like it should be. Why? Because having watched Pete Wicks on TOWIE for the last six years, we know the women around him always seem to be worse off for falling for him.

The 32-year-old has been involved in a number of high-profile cheating scandals, from sexting an Instagram model while on holiday with ex-girlfriend Megan McKenna to repeating said virtual cheating on TOWIE cast member Shelby Tribble two years later.

Since then, TOWIE viewers have found out he’s had an on-and-off casual relationship with Chloe Sims for more than two years, something she put to an end in the last series because she needed commitment from him - and despite their obvious love for each other - he didn’t want to give it to her.

Now, he’s on our screens having the most intense, sexually charged conversations with Ella Rae-Wise, 21. After Ella admitted to a friend that the pair kissed a few months ago, he tried to imply she had something of a schoolgirl crush on him whereas he was uninterested. In a later scene, he met her for drinks, flirted outrageously with her (the eye contact, the lip licking, it was almost hard to watch) and told her he didn’t want anything serious, to which she stated she didn’t either, and they concluded they could be ‘flirty friends’.

One thing we should remember right about now? There’s an 11-year age difference between them. Ella started the show in 2019 aged 19 (yes, she’s a noughties baby… we’re crying too) alongside a few other newbie teens that intended to bring some fresh drama. It seems the original cast had gradually matured out of love-triangles and petty fights. But that’s the thing, the juxtaposition of the new versus old cast made all of the teen drama appear just that: immature. It seems strange then, that two season later Ella is being paired up with the one of the oldest TOWIE cast members who previously had a very age-appropriate relationship with 38-year-old Chloe Sims.

It’s important to remember that TOWIE is structured reality TV (‘part-soap opera, part reality show’ the ITV website states) so this entire narrative could be manufactured by producers - honestly, we hope so. But while meet-ups and storylines are often set up, TOWIE stars are free to say and behave how they like during the scenes – at least, according to producers.

‘It is unscripted,’ Sarah Tyekiff – TOWIE’s executive producer told VICE last year. ‘We don’t tell people what they’re going to say, and sometimes people walk into scenes and they don’t know they’re going to be there. It was quite hard to work out how much was scripted and how much was real until I got to Lime, and then I was pleasantly surprised that it was authentic. Actually, you watch the stuff and it’s so real because the cast are so brilliant, and give themselves to it so much.’

If TOWIE truly is unscripted, then my crush on Pete Wicks may need to be cast into the realms of guilty pleasures you never admit to. (Too late, but oh well). Because, watching him converse with Ella on screen, the decade-plus age difference starts to show in a concerning way. In one scene between Ella, Pete and James Diags, Ella confronts Pete about him downplaying their flirtation so as to seem that she was obsessed with him. She’s shared her receipts in a previous scene with a friend, showcasing texts he’s sent her initiating the flirty conversations. It also helps that we quite literally saw him practically eye-fucking her across the table in the last episode.

What follows is textbook gaslighting that without the presence of Diags would’ve gone completely unchallenged…

‘When people were asking you what’s going on, you were really playing it down and I don’t know why, it’s like you’re a bit embarrassed,’ Ella said. ‘I feel like you’re being muggy and you didn’t like the fact that I told people we’d had a kiss.’

‘I’m not embarrassed about it, I don’t regret what happened between me and you but I think everyone else is blowing it up,’ Pete replied. ‘I was confused you would tell people something that happened three months ago.’

When Ella asked ‘Why not?’ and said she ‘wasn’t going to keep it a secret’, Pete repeated that his problem was with ‘everyone else’ blowing up the kiss to mean something more. Thankfully, Diags was there to get to the root of the issue.

‘So why play it down Pete?’ he asked. ‘To Ella you’re clearly flirting, even now there’s some weird tension I can feel, is it sexual?’

‘Yeah, it is sexual tension,’ Pete admits, turning to Ella. ‘When I do see you I can’t help but be flirty with you especially when you look like that, what d’you want me to do?’

‘Sometimes, it looks like you’re saving yourself at the expense of other people’s feelings…and you have done it before,’ Diags says as the audience at home applauds someone saying what Ella clearly wants to.

In one last ditch attempt to rescue his image, Pete says he ‘felt like I was saving us’, to which Ella replies ‘No you’ve saved yourself’ as Diags nods. Finally, Pete apologises to Ella and says ‘f*ck everyone else, we’ll do what we want to do.’

Frankly, the scene was just as hard to watch as their initial drinks. Because, while an 11-year-age gap in itself isn't necessarily an issue, when you’re watching a man with Pete’s relationship history attempt to gaslight a woman a decade younger than him, who would’ve succeeded in said gaslighting without his friend there to call him out, it’s uncomfortable.

Especially, when you fancy Pete Wicks. Honestly, no one would rather Pete be a good guy than the women like me that can’t help but be attracted to him, let’s be honest. But why, oh why, do we still fancy him despite seeing for ourselves how objectively awful he is to women that like him?

Even in his attempts at honesty, you can see a clear pattern of toxicity. Throughout all his casual relationships, he’s pretty clear that he doesn’t want anything serious, that he needs to work on himself. He appears to tell Chloe a few times that he’s too worried about his own issues with commitment to jeopardise their friendship by formalising their relationship… and yet he continued to have casual sex with her for two plus years.

Yes, it’s likely to be a lot more complicated than we know, but it’s worth remembering that in the way Pete portrays himself on TOWIE, that whole ‘I’m honest and upfront about what I want’ thing can be just as toxic as men that lead you on. Be honest and upfront, yes, but let your actions portray those words too. Just telling a woman you ‘don’t want commitment’ isn’t enough if behind the scenes you’re acting like her boyfriend or giving any sense of false hope – particularly when you have a feeling she wants more.

Of course, not all women want more. Ella could be completely fine with a casual relationship, and we shouldn’t remove her agency just because she’s 21. Hell, men assuming women always want to date them is just as annoying as the aforementioned ‘I’ve been upfront the whole time’ spiel.

But watching this entire scenario play out on TOWIE, I can’t help but feel uncomfortable. Pete so often appears as the perfect guy, he’s funny, he’s vegan, he cares about animals. He’s got that long-hair thing that continues to be attractive even after man-buns went out of style, he's covered in tattoos and in the main, he does appear to be a good friend to women – but then you see the way the women that like him romantically end up hurt and confused and it all goes downhill from there. He’s the common denominator and we know it, so why do we still fancy him?

Maybe it’s the fact we see so many women continue to fall for him despite his obvious shortcomings, maybe he’s gaslighting all of us into fancying him, maybe in person he's super charming (he is, I can confirm) but honestly… we probably shouldn’t. I say that like I’m going to stop, but hey, I’m only human. Perhaps the only thing to do is sit and process why we all have kind of terrible taste in men… drinks anyone?

Click through for Pete Wick's relationship history...