Matt Damon spoke openly about his use of the f-word in an interview with The Sunday Times this weekend, explaining that he only stopped using the homophobic slur recently after his daughter taught him it was unacceptable.
‘The word that my daughter calls the “f-slur for a homosexual” was commonly used when I was a kid, with a different application,’ Damon said. ‘I made a joke, months ago, and got a treatise from my daughter. She left the table.’
He then explained that she wrote him a letter explaining why the word was so dangerous, to which he replied ‘I retire the f-slur!’
Damon has three daughters with his partner Luciana - Isabella, Gia and Stella – the oldest of whom, Isabella, is 15 while Gia is 12 and Stella only nine. He also has a 22-year-old step-daughter from Luciana’s previous marriage named Alexia.
Of course, at 50-years-old, many are questioning why it was up to a child to explain that to her father shouldn’t be using a homophobic slur. Matt Damon has all of the resources to educate himself on offensive and problematic language, he has been active in Hollywood since 1988 – with a team of people around him whose entire job it is to maintain his reputation.
How, after five decades of life experience, with so much privilege and such a huge platform, was he still using the f-slur until a few months ago? There is no doubt Damon has come into contact with countless queer people, experienced the storytelling of queer narratives in Hollywood and listened to speeches where fellow celebrities will stand up for LGBTQ+ issues. It is, quite frankly, impossible that he did not understand the context of the word – particularly since he was using it as the punchline to a joke.
What we’re seeing here, is a man so wrapped in privilege and power that he has spent 50 years on this planet without once stepping outside his own experience as a heterosexual man to understand that using someone’s sexual orientation as a joke may perpetuate homophobia.
To not even profess some surprise at his own ignorance after learning how harmful the term is, or admit guilt that he'd been openly using such an ignorant word for so long? It implies a level of nonchalance that suggests he still has not grasped how truly dangerous homophobic language or 'jokes' are.
Because how can a man with so many people around him protecting his reputation - and relying on it to have a job - tell this story so casually in an interview with a journalist? The bubble-wrap that comes with fame has clearly taken it's toll, so much so Damon felt this was some kind of endearing or universal anecdote about parenthood.
A teenage girl should not have to educate her father on offensive language, nor how it perpetuates certain forms of oppression.
But it’s not endearing at all, it’s damning. A teenage girl should not have to educate her father on offensive language, nor how it perpetuates certain forms of oppression. Damon is the parent, he should be the one teaching his daughter how to be a caring and empathetic person towards others, someone that knows the difference between right and wrong and can think beyond their own experience to understand how others are treated differently based on things they cannot control.
Were we meant to croon over this story of a father learning such basic social etiquette from his daughter? Ignore the fact that Damon could’ve been offending any one person at that table – his daughters included – and gush over how sweet it is that once again, the burden is on women and girls to share their emotional intelligence in order to guide the men around them?
Or, does Damon think this is some kind-of universal father-child experience? As if the f-slur is so widely used that only the ‘woke’ generation of gen-z would understand it’s ignorance? We hate to break it to you Damon, but the rest of us grown adults have been aware of that terms offensiveness for a long time – the fact you weren’t makes us concerned for what else you’re saying round the dinner table. Guess what they say is true, a daughters job is never finished…
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