Scrolling through Twitter this morning, you’ll notice a very bold proclamation in the form of one music thread: Girl power is dead. Why? Because Little Mix have become embroiled in a so-called ‘feud’ since Jesy Nelson’s debut single hit the headlines following accusations of Blackfishing.
The Little Mix trio unfollowed Jesy soon after she told reporters that she hadn’t spoken to the girls in a year during promotional interviews for her now controversial song, Bad Boyz. Jesy has since unfollowed the girls too, leading The Telegraph to declare their fallout the ‘most depressing feud pop has ever seen.’
Honestly, I would agree – but that doesn’t mean the women no longer stand for ‘girl power’. The reason Little Mix’s fallout is depressing is not because the reputation of girl power rested on their shoulders, it’s because they managed to avoid this very sexist ‘catfight’ narrative for so long.
For decades, women belonging to the same band, TV show or industry have been pitted against each other. Female-dominated casts were dogged with accusations of jealousy and in-fighting – Desperate Housewives, Sex and The City, 90210 are just a few that spring to mind – throughout the noughties and 2010s. Girl bands like Spice Girls, Girls Aloud and Fifth Harmony faced similar reputational smears, tabloids quick to look for any sign of discord between members right from their inception.
It sold papers, got clicks, because everyone LOVES a catfight allegation – but ultimately, it came at the detriment to women everywhere. The ‘catfight’ narrative perpetuates the idea that it’s impossible for female friendships to be genuine, that we can’t even be professional without jealousy getting in the way. It invalidated so many women’s success, framing them as ‘petty’ and ‘immature’, ultimately impacting all women’s opportunities by embedding stereotypes that we can’t put our emotions aside when there’s another woman in the room.
Little Mix, however, avoided all of that. Don’t get me wrong, tabloids have attempted to sew seeds of doubt as to whether the girls really get on for years, but nothing ever stuck. Their authentic bond was palpable in interviews, a relationship that seemed to remain healthy despite being pitted against each other in the press and having album after album underestimated. Even after Jesy announced she was leaving, the idea that the girls hated each other was far from anyones mind.
It’s no surprise that their unfollows and public statements have been dubbed ‘depressing’ then, because for many of us they represented a win against enduring sexism.
But actually, when you consider how long the women have worked together, how much they’ve gone through personally and the weight of the industry they work in – it’s not fair to place that burden on them.
Sometimes, friendships fall apart – that doesn’t mean girl power is over. In the past few years, we’ve seen Jesy open up about her personal struggles with body image being part of a group of beautiful women. Insecurity, whatever form it comes, takes its toll on not only you but your relationships – we’ve all had that friend whose personal struggles result in a lot of emotional labour for both you and her. It’s why so many understood Jesy’s decision to step away from Little Mix knowing it was probably what’s best for all the women.
Sometimes it’s not a catfight, sometimes it’s just moving on.
We’ve also seen Leigh-Anne Pinnock open up about feeling incredibly lonely as a Black woman performing in white-dominated rooms. We’ve seen them grow up, have kids and find new passions. In the last decade, they’ve been through A LOT.
What we should take from all of that is how inherently complex their relationships with each other, and the group as an entity, will be. They’ve spent a decade working together during the most formative years of their lives and sometimes friendships simply don’t withstand time.
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That doesn’t mean their friendship before wasn’t genuine or that they’ve descended into ‘petty’ fights and hating each other even now. In fact, any effort to frame it as that feels salacious. Women shouldn’t have to make up or publicly be friendly to continue to escape the catfight narrative – men certainly don’t have to. Sometimes it’s not a catfight, sometimes it’s just moving on.
Jesy Nelson Has Been Accused Of Cultural Appropriation And Blackfishing On Her Debut Single
Why Should Leigh-Anne Pinnock Be The One To Hold Jesy Nelson Accountable For Blackfishing?