Bill Clinton Says His Affair With Monica Lewinsky Was To ‘Manage Anxiety’

'Here's something that will take your mind off [your job] for a while.'

Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky

by Georgia Aspinall |
Updated on

Bill Clinton has given an illuminating interview as part of a new Hulu documentary about Hillary Clinton’s career, opening up about the reasons behind his affair with Monica Lewinsky. Talking about the 17-month affair, he said it was something ‘I did to manage my anxieties’.

In the first televised interview since he refused to apologise to Lewinsky in 2018, Bill spoke about his mindset during the affair, how he told Hillary and how the couple went on to stay married.

On why he did it, he implied that the pressures of the job made him in need of a distraction. ‘You feel like you're staggering around, you've been in a 15 round prize fight that was extended to 30 rounds and here's something that will take your mind off it for a while, that's what happens,’ he said.

‘Everybody's life has pressures and disappointments, terrors, fears of whatever,’ he continued. ‘Things I did to manage my anxieties for years. I'm a different, totally different person than I was… 20 years ago.’

The documentary, which airs today, also sees Bill express sympathy for how Lewinsky’s life and career was uprooted by the scandal. ‘I feel terrible about the fact that Monica Lewinsky's life was defined by it, unfairly I think,’ he commented. ‘Over the years I've watched her trying to get a normal life back again but you've got to decide how to define normal.’

Hillary too opens up about the experience, explaining that she believed him when he lied to both her and the grand jury investigating his personal affairs in 1998. ‘I was just devastated,’ she said. ‘I could not believe it. I was so personally just hurt and I can't believe this, I can't believe you lied.’

Discussing how Bill told her of the affair, her husband added ‘I went and sat on the bed and talked to her. I told her exactly what happened, when it happened. I said I feel terrible about it.'

‘She said you have to tell your daughter,’ Bill continued. ‘She said that's worse than me. So I did that, which was awful.’

At the time, the family went to Martha’s Vineyard on holiday before returning to the US to fight Bill’s impeachment – which he won; he later served a second term as President. But it was the image of Chelsea, Clinton’s daughter, holding both her parents' hands as the family set off to resolve their issues on holiday that got to Hillary most during the interview.

Bill, Chelsea and Hillary Clinton
©Getty Images

‘When she did that, oh my gosh, I thought that's just so incredible, so strong and so wise,’ Hillary said emotionally. She revealed they then sought counselling to get through the ordeal.

The comments from Bill have naturally attracted a lot of comments online as people question his use of a mental health condition to justify what some allege was sexual harassment. While Bill says in the documentary he is not trying to defend himself, just explain, many are asking for an apology from him to Lewinsky, not an explanation.

According to reports, Bill does offer Lewinsky an apology in the documentary. The full film is available on Hulu now, and promises to offer more than just a salacious look into one of the biggest scandals in US politics. Exploring Hillary’s career to date, it gives telling insight into the challenges she’s faced as a woman running for President. So, whether you’re tuning in to hear Bill apologise for himself or not, it’s sure to be an important watch.

Read More:

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Monica Lewinsky Is A Producer On A New Series About The Bill Clinton Impeachment Scandal

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