Its May 2023 and Taylor Swift’s love life is still dictating a significant proportion of her career. While she may be known for penning absolute anthems off the back of relationships and break ups with some of the world’s most (and least) eligible bachelors, Taylor’s current alleged choice of paramour has upset fans, and she hasn’t even written anything about him yet.
The singer has been reportedly linked with The 1975 frontman Matty Healy after (once again, allegedly) splitting with long-time boyfriend Joe Alwyn earlier this year. Matty is no stranger to making headlines – back in 2019, The Tab ran an article exhaustively listing ‘the w**kiest stuff’ he’s ever said. He has also recently apologised for laughing at racist comments about rapper Ice Spice on the Adam Friedland Show podcast.
He addressed the podcast backlash on stage in Auckland, New Zealand, saying ‘Ice Spice, I’m sorry. It’s not because I’m annoyed that me joking got misconstrued. It’s because I don’t want Ice Spice to think I’m a d**k. I love you, Ice Spice. I’m so sorry.’
Fans aren’t happy though, and some even put together a #SpeakUpNow open letter to the singer, urging her to ‘reflect on the impact of your own and your associates’ behaviour’ and to ‘use your platforms responsibly and intentionally’.
Azaelia Banks even took to her Instagram stories to voice her distaste at Taylor’s alleged choice of partner/fling/romance – whatever it is. ‘He’s not on the level of powerful p*ss you worked hella hard to build,’ she posted. ‘Ugh, so many much cooler people in music to work with.’
She continued: ‘You cannot be letting him climb the rich white c***hie mountain, sis.’
But this suggestion that Taylor should ‘level up’ comes from a mistaken notion that who she dates is any of our business, and an assumption that she condones any problematic behaviour Matty may or may not be responsible for.
After dating Joe Alwyn – an arguably much quieter, stoic presence – for six years, maybe Taylor has a few reckless rebound decisions in the bank. To judge her (alleged) dating choices is to judge any woman who has made an ‘out there’, unexpected dating move after years of comfortable cohabitation. It’s natural, and it’s not something to be attacked for.
Of course, it’s not that Matty’s behaviour isn’t relevant or potentially problematic, and the issues that fans are pointing out are certainly important ones, it’s just that the choice to date him shouldn’t be reflected on Taylor’s identity, reputation or any other part of her life. Her choice is personal, even if it makes headlines.
And while Taylor undeniably has a responsibility to use her platform to spotlight issues that are important to her, and to not incite hate or support of problematic issues, the suggestion that her romantic link to a person (that hasn’t even been officially confirmed yet) affects who she is as a person or performer just feels a bit misogynistic.
It’s tiresome, but the person a woman chooses to date seems to bleed into society’s sense of who she is much more than when a man does the same. So until the day men carry around the same burden of their female partner’s every decision, comment and flaw – maybe we should just step off and let Taylor live her life?