In the list of Made In Chelsea characters we'd like to hang out with IRL, only one person comes close to Mark Francis; cheeky chappie and adorable entrepeneur Jamie Laing. So, when we heard he was over at heat Radio recording a show, we headed over to track him down and find out how exactly he plans to take Andy down (gladiatorial style apparently).
Jamie Biscuits, why is everyone being so mean this season?
I don’t know why...
Is it the 'bois' stirring?
No we don’t stir! The girls are mean for no reason and the guys just chill.
Hmmm. Not sure about that.
But no, this season’s really fun. I know people don’t like new people coming in but these guys are really fun.
Yep, they certainly seem it! Do you fancy Emily?
Ever since we were little I’ve fancied Emily, she’s the cutest. I love people with their own style and people who are their own person.
Are you going to fight Andy over Jess?
I mean Andy will fight me...
Who would win?
Me. I’d kill him. Put us in a gladiator ring and I’d kill him. There would be no mercy. Even if they put the thumbs up I’d still kill him.
Wow. What’s going on with Myttons and Nicola?
I don’t know. I feel like they’re very much in love but the problem is she lives in Ireland.
That’s far…
It is far.
Could you do long distance?
I’ve never done it… it’s a bit of an effort. But Myttons and Nicola are in love and doing great so fingers crossed. I guess it's quite hard to trust him but he’s been a good boy!
Do you wish all your guy friends were single?
Yes! I want them all to be single and I want us to live in a big house together and that’s what I want. I want to buy a big house in London, all move in together and that’s it - we’re all single for the rest of our lives.
Erm…
Everyone always thinks that I want all the guys to be single. I’m like the spoiled brat. Like, ‘Stop being in a relationship, you loser’.
So you don’t want a girlfriend, Jamie?
I mean I feel like I do want a girlfriend but I would never rush into it. It’s really scary. A lot of people just jump at it and it’s the wrong decision and the worst thing in the world, as we know, is getting hurt. But even hurting someone sucks as well so you don’t want to make the wrong choice.
Yeah, why’s everyone moving in together? Me and my boyfriend have been together for seven years and we don’t live together.
I know! It’s SO INTENSE what’s the point of moving in?
You’ve got the rest of your life!
I’m with you all the way. I don’t understand why people do it, why you would think of doing it?
This got serious very fast.
I know! Are we in therapy? I love it.
Moving on. What’s the meanest thing you’ve ever got Sam to do for you?
Once we were out at a restaurant together and I was like, ‘You’ve got to go and get my dry cleaning’ and he was like ‘Buddy we’re at a restaurant together’ and I was like, ‘I don’t care. I need it’. So he had to go all the way to pick me up a shirt.
Hahaha I could use a PA. Would you recommend getting an intern?
Yes, get one, they’re great. You need some slightly younger, slightly impressionable, slightly immature who thinks you’re great… done.
How do you approach girls when you’re out?
I think I’m just loud and energetic and that draws attention. The funny thing about going out though is that guys go out and say ‘Oh I’m going to go and hook up with a cute chick’ but guys never really actually talk to the cute girls.
THIS IS WHY guys never talk to me. Maybe
Guys never approach girls. I go ‘oh no I didn’t meet anyone’ and it's because, Jamie, you didn’t approach anyone. Approach people!
Should girls go up to guys?
Guys and girls should just go and do whatever. Everyone should have sex!
Do you always pay for everything?
For sure. I hate anyone paying for me in general. I quite like paying for everyone whatever stage you’re at. Things come around, karma and stuff like that. So friends who can’t afford things at this point... I always think it’ll come round later in life.
That’s nice of you
Yeah it’s sweet right? I paid for my buddy to go to Barbados with me last Christmas.
You are a good friend to have
Right… Wait. Maybe that’s why they’re my friends?
No…. course not!
Yeah, they were there before.. right!?
Yeah, sure. So where would you take someone on a date?
Never plan your date. Meet up with a girl, ask them what they want to do and then just go and do it. Never plan a beginning, middle or end.
That sounds very disorganised.
I’m very spontaneous so I need someone who’s going to be like that as well.
So you need to have an adventure?
An adventure, exactly!
Made In Chelsea star Jamie Laing joins heat Radio to host a special show this Saturday from 10am-12pm. Click here for more.
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Made In Chelsea 9.2 - Josh Is No Fun, Nicola Impresses No-one And Stephanie Is Done!
Follow Jess on Twitter @Jess_Commons
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.