Like Khloe Kardashian, Most Mums’ Social Lives Don’t ‘Snap Back’ After Having Children

'I can relate to Khloe wanting to be at home with her kids, but you can feel like a bit of a loser and a failure,' one mum tells Grazia.

Kim and Khloe

by Georgia Aspinall |
Published on

The Kardashian sisters are fighting again, and this time it’s entered mum-shaming territory. In last night’s episode of The Kardashian’s, Kim accused Khloe of spending too much time at home with her children, telling her she needs to ‘get out’ and live her life. Where did this unsolicited advice come from? Well, it all stemmed from Kim being annoyed that Khloe offered to do Chicago’s (Kim’s daughter) hair for her after she turned up at Kris Jenner’s house with unwashed hair before school.

Accusing Khloe of being condescending, Kim felt as though Khloe was accusing her of being a bad parent for leaving hair gel in Chicago’s hair overnight and letting her go to school with it the next day.

While Khloe insisted that wasn’t on her mind, Kim became increasingly irate and began accusing Khloe of being a helicopter parent. ‘Maybe you wouldn’t have such a stick up your arse […] if you lived your life a little bit,’ Kim said in a confessional. ‘It’s just crazy. Interact with other human beings besides the children and your family all day long… you need some other human interaction.’

The conversation then turned to Khloe having a rigid schedule with her children, which Khloe says is just the children waking up, eating dinner and going to bed at the same times each day. The interaction has caused intense debate online, with a clip of it gaining over 8million views on X.

‘It sounds like Kim really was facing her own mom guilt and trying to put it on Khloe,’ one person tweeted in response. ‘As a mom every day is not gonna be 100% and you gotta give yourself grace. I don't think Khloe was tryna be nasty with that. Kim was wrong here.’

‘Telling Khloe to live her life and go out more as if she hasn’t already travelled the entire world and done everything she’s probably wanted to do,’ another added. ‘She clearly values being a mom, a present and active mom, more than going out and doing things she’s done a million times already.’

Others accused Kim of being insecure and putting work over her children too much, ultimately feeding an entirely different mum-shaming narrative that shows just how divisive topics like this can get. With both sisters now being mum shamed online, it nods to the age-old question, can mothers ever really have it all?

Khloe’s lack of social life certainly relatable for mothers struggling to balance work, caregiving and time with friends. ‘I found it a real struggle to get my social life back since having my son,’ says Jessica, 40 from Bath. ‘There’s a high expectation on mums to “get back to normal” and start making plans, organising girls trips, having big nights out and for me that just hasn’t been the reality.

‘I see a lot of other mums with their social lives back to normal and that’s great, I’m sure for them it’s not ever really how it was before, but for me it feels as though I’m on the outside because I’m more like Khloe in that I have always been there for bedtime and I always want to be with my son,’ Jess continues. ‘No one should be shamed either way, but wanting to be at home you can feel like a bit of a loser and a failure.’

All the tension comeswhen you’re trying so hard to be your old self even though everything is totally different.

Rebecca, 41 from London, agrees. ‘In the same way that mums are applauded for their bodies snapping back, when someone has a baby, they are really praised for snapping back into their old life,’ she says. ‘But actually, the reality is the amount of effort and heartache that can go into presenting that front is huge.

‘I feel like after my first son was born, I was probably perpetuating that unhelpful narrative that you can just be out and about but actually it was really hard to do that,’ she continues. ‘We’re all told that nothing will change when you have a baby, but things do change a lot and accepting that your life is in a different place is quite freeing. All the conflict and tension comes in when you’re trying so hard to be your old self even though everything is totally different.’

Of course, the Kardashian’s live a very different, much more privileged life than most of us can relate to. But that being said, Khloe has been open about the fact that she’s very much solo parenting when Tristan Thompson (the father of her children) is working away as she doesn’t have nanny support in the same way her sisters do. Like so many mums, she’s just trying to be as hands on as possible while still meeting work commitments and making some time for friends.

So, can we give the mum-shaming a rest? Whether you’re trying to claw back your social life or prefer to be at home, there’s no one right way to be a mother.

Just so you know, whilst we may receive a commission or other compensation from the links on this website, we never allow this to influence product selections - read why you should trust us