To re-cap, first there's "M", who I snogged in an act of unprecedented bravery.
Unexpectedly, there's also The Yorkshireman - an over-achiever whose quick wit and warm eyes took me by surprise, especially after I cancelled on him three times.
I wasn't looking to add another to the mix, but, here I am, about to meet The Belgian. Yes, I'm struggling to keep up too.
Last Wednesday, when my mate Mary-Kate had to leave the pub, I resigned myself to heading home to half-heartedly masturbate and get an early-ish night. It was a shame, because I was having a great eyebrow day and had on new &Other Stories boots that deserved to be seen. I wanted at least one more drink. It was only 10 pm. Then I remembered oHello.
The oHello app finds people online to spontaneously – like within 45 minutes spontaneously - meet offline, face-to-face. No back-and-forth, just a drink to see if you get on.
Dating makes you super aware of who you wish was on the other end of the phone.
"Okay fine," I told Mary-Kate. "Leave. But help me figure out this app first, would you? That red wine has me feeling bold enough to give it a go."
We picked six blokes, based only on a profile photo, and let my phone do the rest. "You're meeting The Belgian!" it bellowed at me in seconds, which means he was the first to respond.
I used the in-app messenger to say: "I've never done this before. Are you game?" He was at a book launch around the corner and up for a swift half. "I'll be there," he said.
36, shaggy-haired, an art historian with a residency at Brown University behind him and a nonchalant air that only Dutch-speakers seem to have, he was very... practical. Reminded me of a boss I used to crush on. Spoke philosophically about almost everything, but laughed a lot, too. Was still playful.
When you know exactly zero about a person the 'what do you do?' small-talk most dates start with seems stupid. Forced. So we chatted aimlessly about my nana's 90th birthday and how dating apps are bizarre. The impulsiveness of our meeting made everything seem sexy and exciting. I'd been nervous for approximately five seconds, and then it was like I was chatting with some guy who'd ordered next to me at the bar. Non-committal, but intriguing. A little provocative. Most importantly: light. Expectation-less. A new way to meet people, if you ask me.
At half eleven the pub closed, and so we bid goodbye. "Send me a message," he told me as I pecked his cheek. "Okay," I said, outwardly smiling because he was nice - but knowing I wouldn't. Somebody else was on my mind.
That's the thing about dating, isn't it: it makes you super aware of who you wish was on the other end of the phone. It was suddenly very clear to me which bloke I really fancied. The one I should be making most effort with. Putting myself out there for. I got in a cab and text The Yorkshireman. "Hello. I'd like to see you again. Would you like to see me?"
You can find Laura Jane's column each week in Grazia magazine, on sale every Tuesday.
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