The Hyper Masculinity In TOWIE Has Gotten Out Of Hand

There has always been a niggling twinkle of problematic tendencies running through glitz and glam of The Only Way Is Essex. It’s the sort of thing that many of us have probably been vaguely aware of, but not so much so that we’ve really challenged it. At the crux of the show is the juicy, tabloid-worthy relationship drama between it’s cast members. But the relationship rules that TOWIE likes to play by are pretty sexist, and recently it’s all gotten out of hand.

This seasons' first couple of episodes have pissed TOWIE fans off. James Lock was seen manically shouting at his girlfriend Yazmin Oukhellou in a club, telling her that she was a ‘spoilt little brat’ who was ‘playing the victim’. In a conversation with his pal Jordan Wright, Myles Barnett decided it would be fun to call his girlfriend Courtney Green ‘a fucking slag’ for talking to another man away from his watchful eye.

It’s that sort of gross, aggressive unacceptable behaviour that would make your skin crawl and your heart race in anger, only for it to be brushed off as if it were a typical and un-troublesome way to treat and speak about women. It’s the sort of thing that I’d hope no one IRL would stand for. It’s the sort of thing that prompted Twitter users to call for Myles to be kicked off the show and Women’s Aid to challenge producers encouraging this sort of behaviour for entertainment.

In a statement posted to the Women’s Aid website, Campaigns and Public Affairs Manager Sian Hawkins described the male stars’ behaviour towards the female cast as ‘archetypal manifestations of hyper masculinity and extreme “lad banter”’. While the latter is a thinly veiled term used to excuse shoddy man behaviour, we’re all too aware that out in the real world the issue of hyper or toxic masculinity seriously needs addressing and broadcasting this sort of behaviour without any sort of consequence on the men so used to performing it really doesn’t help the cause.

‘[TOWIE] has provided a voyeuristic lens into the sexist world we try to challenge at Women’s Aid, as we know that the everyday sexism it normalises underpins a culture that allows domestic abuse to still be perpetrated at endemic levels.’ Hawkins wrote.

She went on to explain that these depictions of worrying male-female dynamics ‘does nothing to show viewers about: what is and isn’t acceptable in relationships, what crosses the line from an unhealthy relationship to abuse, and , how patterns of verbally abusive and controlling behaviours can escalate over time’.

In response to Women’s Aid’s statement, a spokesperson for TOWIE told the MailOnline that ‘The Only Way Is Essex reflects the real lives of the cast. The producers strive to portray the whole story without censorship or comment whilst being aware that behaviour should not go unchallenged’.

They outlined that in the episodes that aired there were scenes that showed reflection on the situation such as when Chloe asked James if when he had a daughter, he’d ‘want her partner to speak to her the way you speak to Yaz?’, but in the context of the outrage that came from these last two episodes alone and years of the uncomfortable normalisation of out-dated relationship dynamics, I’m not sure a couple of empty apologies embedded in an episode of the ‘reality’ TV that also depends on it for entertainment is enough. Especially when the IRL world making much bigger strides forward than the not-quite-real world of TOWIE.

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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.