Last week, I ventured into the First Dates restaurant. All, ahem, in the name of journalism. (Though, meeting Mr Right would be no any bad thing...). My blind-date was a ‘background’ one, so won’t be explicitly featured on TV unlike the ‘featured’ ones. The experience was scary, strange and ultimately a heart-warming one. Here’s the lowdown.
The drinking starts super-early in the First Dates restaurant
Instructed to arrive at 11, the girls were immediately ushered into one room, and the boys another. Thankfully, the paperwork and explanations weren’t a problem because there was chocolate on hand – and even wine! Even for an enthusiastic drinker like myself, this seemed pretty early. But, when in St Paul’s.
Backstage, the girls toasted to a fun date. It was very girly: as we drank, we shared our worst date experiences and a giggle. I felt like I was at pre-drinks with my pals. Our dates, and midday, came around almost too quick. The featured dates entered the restaurant from 1pm, so overall there was some pretty early alcohol consumption for all involved.
The First Dates producers are chill
Despite this, the alcohol wasn’t even necessary because everyone was so bloody nice! My (new) friend Lauren and I had a quick chat with a producer outside the chop house, who said how much fun everyone has. We clearly looked dubious so he insisted and told us he’d made a best friend on a background date at the restaurant.
We also found out how seriously the First Dates crew take match-making. Apparently, they have a ton of photo potentials up on their wall that they’re in constant discussion to find suitable dates for. Particular effort goes into the featured dates; interviews prior to filming go on for over an hour! Everyone’s loveliness didn’t, however, mean that the walk into Paternoster Chop House wasn’t incredibly nerve-wracking…
Fred from First Dates is even better in real life than on-screen
Upon entering the restaurant, you’re told only to relax and have fun. This proved immensely difficult at first, thanks to the fact that cameras are pretty much EVERYWHERE.
But there’s a reason that maître d Fred is the first person you come into contact with: he has a superhuman ability for making people feel at ease. He noted my red coat (OK fine, the one I borrowed from my sister) and named me little red riding hood, with a charming smile.
After that, let’s be honest, my date, an estate agent from Essex, stood no chance. Though he was nearly as excited by Fred as I was. Hey, at least that gave us something in common.
The First Dates restaurant’s food is distinctly average
The Chop House has some very good reviews on TripAdvisor, so I feel kind of bad in dismissing its food. Maybe it’s because there was a special (read: shortened) First Dates menu, but I wasn’t really impressed. So much so that I actually complained about how small my spaghetti portion was (doubly foolish, I know). The outrageously smooth Fred came to the rescue, as hoped, and I got more – for free.
I then proceeded to finish my second main course of the day while my date picked at his so-so steak. We passed up dessert in favour of cocktails, which was a great shout since conversation began to flow more freely and we shamelessly decided that we should have been featured dates, as were much more fun than some of the serious wallflowers around us.
We’re all ridiculously obsessed with our phones
This light-hearted account however, doesn’t explain just how awkward the dates and surroundings could be. Unlike normal restaurants bustling with background music, crying kids and reunited friends, there was just an abundance of couples being incredibly polite. One of which didn’t appear to converse for a good half hour.
I think most people were conscious of wanting to come across well, but as a result seemed a little reserved. When people weren’t complaining about their food (joke, I was the only one), they really did seem to be on their phones a lot of the time.
Scrolling through Facebook was saved for when their partner was in the loo, but the devices were omnipresent: whether casually placed on the side of the table or being used to illustrate an anecdote. I kept mine firmly in my bag, which, in all honesty, felt like more of a shock to the system than it should have done.
There are officially no men out there
The show’s producers genuinely complained to me about how hard it is to find guys. My unsympathetic response was a ‘don’t tell me, I’m acutely aware’.
In spite of a fit man deficit that, I swear, does exist, the array of talent was pretty decent. The majority of people I spied in the First Dates restaurant seemed genuinely good-looking and well-dressed. So much so that it’s pretty tempting to apply for a featured date. Watch this space.
Traditional gender roles are still a thing
I feel like a wise old sage having listened in on so many first dates. While it’s hard to gather conclusions on chemistry from afar, something I definitely noticed was how often guys paid for the meal.
It’s hard to know if this would’ve happened quite so much had the dates not been filmed, but equality runs both ways, so it’s tempting to rebuke us ladies for letting it happen. Saying that, I let my date pay, and we are all working for free now thanks to the gender pay gap, so maybe I was just doing my bit to redress the balance.
We’re all pretty similar, really
A selection of six of us featured and background girls ended up huddled in the ladies loos at one point in the meal. The ensuing goss about our dates was a cute little highlight, as it showed how much people try to impress, but deep down just want someone to snuggle and be silly with. I also learnt that, unfortunately, yet unsurprisingly, appearances do matter. Everyone talked about what their date looked like A LOT.
So, what did I take from the experience? It might be a shallow world, but it’s full of nice people. Oh, and that everyone’s searching for their own happily ever after. Fingers crossed they collide.
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Image: Getty
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.