Can we take a minute for the most sacred law on the British Isles please? No, we’re definitely not talking about those nonsense ones from the Magna Carta that ‘did the rounds’ during lockdown, but the most important of all the statutes - the Five Second rule.
On Tuesday night’s Bake Off, Jurgen had a pastry mishap when his vegan sausage rolls rolled off his baking tray and onto the floor before they’d finished cooking.
He joked to the camera that no-one would know what had happened (!) and served up his bake to the judges at the end of the task at the front of the tent in the show’s quarter final.
Here’s a handy guide to what is acceptable within the limitations of the Five Second Rule:
Foods That Are Always Worth Saving
Most/all of Them.
Foods that are never acceptable for Five Second Rule application:
Soup
Porridge
Cream
Possibly:
Humous (depending on consistency)
Ham (this is wholly dependent on landing pattern - slice totally flush to floor, no, slice or piece easy to quickly removed, possibly)
Notable factors causing extenuating exceptions to the Five Second Rule:
Pavements
Unknown floors
Mystery liquids on floors
When you know for a fact the floor in question is unclean (basic health and safety right there)
But the key here is that most floor foods are fine in the comfort of your own home/baking tent.
It’s not entirely clear whether the Floor Rolls were the exact same ones that made their way into the mouths of both Paul Hollywood and Prue Leith, but either way, the enduring popularity of picking up food quickly from the floor thus ‘saving’ comes to the fore.
Viewers were supportive of the baker’s efficient move. Sentiments like, “Yes Jurgen, five second rule!!” and “Five second rule, it’s all good” flooded Twitter; we are not a nation of food wasters, which is the correct response to this situation.
Does it really matter? Are there not actually more germs on your keyboard/phone/mouse than on the floor? Or have we been fed a lie all our lives? Who cares?!
Long live the Five Second Rule, may it one day be enshrined into the actual laws of the land.