On 4 January 2018, 27-year-old Holly Butcher, from New South Wales, Australia, passed away after her ongoing battle with Ewing’s sarcoma—a rare form of bone cancer that most often affects children and young people.
Before she died, she wrote a moving letter, addressed to the world, offering the life advice she learned in her final months.
‘It’s a strange thing to realise and accept your mortality at 26 years young,’ Butcher begins. She reflects with heartbreaking honesty on what she had hoped her future would look like, and its stark contrast to the reality she found herself living:
‘I always imagined myself growing old, wrinkled and grey- most likely caused by the beautiful family (lots of kiddies) I planned on building with the love of my life. I want that so bad it hurts.
‘I’m 27 now. I don’t want to go. I love my life. I am happy.. I owe that to my loved ones. But the control is out of my hands.’
She urges people to stop worrying about the little, insignificant things, and to be thankful that your problems are little and insignificant:
‘You might have got caught in bad traffic today, or had a bad sleep because your beautiful babies kept you awake, or your hairdresser cut your hair too short. Your new fake nails might have got a chip, your boobs are too small, or you have cellulite on your arse and your belly is wobbling.
'Let all that shit go.. I swear you will not be thinking of those things when it is your turn to go. It is all SO insignificant when you look at life as a whole. I’m watching my body waste away right before my eyes with nothing I can do about it and all I wish for now is that I could have just one more Birthday or Christmas with my family, or just one more day with my partner and dog. Just one more.’
She reminds us that while we might whine about exercising and how much we hate it, we ought to be grateful that we are physically able to exercise. She tells us to appreciate our healthy and functioning bodies, and not to obsess over food or weight. If social media has you bemoaning the fact that you don’t have the “perfect body”, Butcher’s advice is simple—delete that shit.
‘Remember there are more aspects to good health than the physical body.. work just as hard on finding your mental, emotional and spiritual happiness too. That way you might realise just how insignificant and unimportant having this stupidly portrayed perfect social media body really is.. While on this topic, delete any account that pops up on your news feeds that gives you any sense of feeling shit about yourself. Friend or not.. Be ruthless for your own well-being.’
At a time when everyone seems to be making New Year’s resolutions to diet and lose weight and go to the gym, Butcher’s letter offers up a new set of resolutions to live by in 2018.
Don’t get caught up in material things, Butcher says, remember that it’s the experiences and memories that you’ll hold onto at the end.
‘Get up early sometimes and listen to the birds while you watch the beautiful colours the sun makes as it rises.
Listen to music.. really listen. Music is therapy. Old is best.
Cuddle your dog. Far out, I will miss that.
Talk to your friends. Put down your phone. Are they doing okay?
Travel if it’s your desire, don’t if it’s not.
Work to live, don’t live to work.
Seriously, do what makes your heart feel happy.
Eat the cake. Zero guilt.
Say no to things you really don’t want to do.
Don’t feel pressured to do what other people might think is a fulfilling life.. you might want a mediocre life and that is so okay.
Tell your loved ones you love them every time you get the chance and love them with everything you have.’
And finally, she signs off by asking a favour. Blood donation.
‘Oh and one last thing, if you can, do a good deed for humanity (and myself) and start regularly donating blood. It will make you feel good with the added bonus of saving lives. I feel like it is something that is so overlooked considering every donation can save 3 lives! That is a massive impact each person can have and the process really is so simple.
Blood donation (more bags than I could keep up with counting) helped keep me alive for an extra year - a year I will be forever grateful that I got to spend it here on Earth with my family, friends and dog. A year I had some of the greatest times of my life.’
It can be difficult to find perspective in the fast-paced, social media driven lives that we lead these days, but Butcher’s advice offers just that. Step back, live, do good, and enjoy every moment you have on this earth.
Liked this? You might also be interested in...
Former Facebook Exec Tells Us What We Already Know: Social Media Is Ruining Our Lives
Follow Annie Simon on Twitter: @annieasimon
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.