You've all heard the urban legend of the girl who got a tampon stuck inside her and didn't realise for a bit, right? Well, what about this actual, IRL story of a woman who had a sex toy stuck inside her for 10 years? Not just a silver bullet or something, either, a full on five inch sex toy was lodged up her vagina for a decade.
The woman, who was 28 when it went in and 38 when it was removed by doctors at Aberdeen Royal Infirmary, was lucky to have the device taken out when she did as it could have caused some life-threatening damage.
It was only in the past few weeks that she suffered weight loss, shaking, lethargy and mild incontinence, and thought to go to the doctors to check out what was going wrong with her. As it happens, the toy was protruding from her vagina into her bladder, causing a rare condition where urine flows into the vagina and forms what is called an obstructive uropathy, where the kidneys can get harmed after the flow of urine is blocked. Sounds quite a lot like cystitis but even worse, if that's possible to imagine.
The woman, The Sun reports, had been drunk when she used the toy with her partner and couldn't remember if she had removed it afters. She was found to be in sound mind, with a normal IQ and everything.
After removing the object and repairing the damage, doctors writing up the case in the Journal of Sexual Medicine were stunned to have learned that the woman hadn't even noticed that the object was there. The vagina is, as you will all know, full of nerve endings and is therefore very sensitive.
This incident breaks records in that it's the first time a sex toy has been lodged inside a woman's vagina. However, it doesn't quite break the record for the longest time an object has been in a vagina. That goes to a woman who had an undefined object in her vagina for 35 years.
If you have a sudden urge to shove a whole hand up yourself to clear away anything you've been storing up yourself, we totally get you. Which is a weird thing to bond with our readers over, but there you go.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.