When high on weed, even the smallest task - picking up errant bits of torn-off Rizla, finding a new train ticket to make another roach out of, getting on suitable clothing to go down to the Co-Op and buy all of the freshly-baked cookies they have in store for your freshly-baked self to enjoy - can feel like a mountainous task.
Hat tip, then, to the people who were stranded up the Lake District’s Scafell Pike, England’s highest mountain, all because they got so high.
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The group were stoned enough to find clambering down the mountain impossible, so-called Cumbria Police. The force announced the misadventure on its Facebook page, explaining: ‘Persons phoning Cumbria Police because they are stuck on a mountain after taking cannabis. Now having to deploy M’tain Rescue, Air support and Ambulance to rescue them. Words fail us….
The next post read: ‘Persons reduced by MRT, after becoming incapable of walking off mountain due to cannabis use. MRT volunteers putting themselves at risk to prevent harm.’
Social media users, were, as ever, appalled, outraged and in stitches. Our favourite comment so far is: 'A good JOINT effort in finding them'.
Superintendent Justin Bibby reminded hikers, climbers and wanderers of the rules of the mountain: ‘Never underestimate the mountains. Mountain safety is your responsibility.
‘Carry the right equipment and food and know how to use it. Our priority is your safety. The Wasdale mountain rescue team had a particularly busy day yesterday dealing with this and other incidents.’
‘They are volunteers,’ he added, reports Sky News, continuing: ‘they do an amazing job and they are always there to assist those who get into difficulty.’
Just in case no-one knew this - well, it seems as if at least four people didn’t know this - ‘Taking alcohol or any other substance that could impair your judgement significantly increases your risk of getting into trouble; it has no place on a mountain.’
What if the entire mountain is made of cannabis? What if someone’s rending of ‘the right equipment’ to take hiking is a big green bong to match the verdant scenery? What about if you only ever get to think up these sorts of questions when you’re high? Maybe best to keep the altitude down…
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.