Science Has Figured Out The Type Of Man Who Will Give You Stronger Orgasms

Possibly don't read this out to any single, small shouldered, males. They might cry.


by Stevie Martin |
Published on

Ever wondered what sort of man is guaranteed to give you good bonking? Now you can, as researchers at the University of Albany have found that the more successful, funny and strong you perceive a guy (sadly, this was just between guys and girls – no word as to whether this translates to all-girl action), the more intense your orgasm is likely to be. And the more you’re likely to orgasm. And the more you’re likely to want sex.

Thanks, Science! Way to make guys feel way more insecure about themselves!

The study found that wide-shouldered, strong-looking guys that our mates find attractive (weird!) are more likely to get us initiating a sex session – and if we think they’re wealthy, then that really helps things along. Turns out we all want rich, hot, funny men. Who knew.

READ MORE: How To Make Your Sex Life Amazing Again When You’re In A LTR

As gross as it seems, there may be a tad of logic to the idea – evolutionarily speaking, there’s a theory that female orgasms actually help with selecting a good mate.

Because women don’t all come on command (and if you do, then I hate you), we’re more likely to stay with a guy who is willing to take the time to make us orgasm, and that guy is then more likely to be a caring and attentive life partner, as opposed to those who bang away without ever noticing that you’re looking a bit bored.

The survey’s revelation that we’re more likely to come with a partner who is successful, wealthy, funny and strong follows this concept of the female orgasm as mate selector – if we come more easily with these guys, we’re more likely to have successful children. Think about that during your next one-night stand to really get you in the O-mood.

Before your best guy mate reads this and bursts into tears because he’s still on an entry-level wage and doesn’t resemble Bradley Cooper, it’s a) just a preliminary study, and far from conclusive and b) all about subjectivity.

If your specific girl finds you super-hot and super-funny, then she’s probably more likely to come. There’s no universal barometer that shows that anyone who doesn’t meet expectations can’t satisfy their sex partners, otherwise anyone who wasn’t Ryan Gosling would spend their evenings lying next to girls and crying – and every hot guy with a good job would be dynamite between the (sex) sheets.

And, erm, we all know that’s not how it works.

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Follow Stevie on Twitter: @5tevieM

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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