There’s a Batshit Plan To Put Pregnancy Tests In American Bars

Today in Only In America news

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by Sophie Cullinane |
Published on

Today in our Only In America franchise, comes a kooky idea from an Alaskan senator – let’s start stocking state-funded pregnancy tests in pubs, clubs and restaurant toilets! Because there really is no better place to find out if you’re pregnant than in some grotty toilet in a bar, is there?

The (insane) thinking behind Senator Pete Kelly’s proposal is that normal birth control might not be effective at preventing women who ‘binge drink’ from becoming pregnant. So, in an effort to prevent foetal alcohol syndrome/){href='https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/check-the-facts/health-effects-of-alcohol/fertility-and-pregnancy/foetal-alcohol-syndrome-(fas)/' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer'}, Kelly wants to install ‘kiosks and dispensers’ with pregnancy tests in bathrooms of any venue that sells alcohol so women can check if they’re pregnant before they start boozing.

Speaking in the Alaska Senate, Kelly said of his reasoning:

‘If you have people who are binge drinking or chronic drinkers, we're hesitant to say “use birth control as your protection against foetal alcohol syndrome,” because again, as I say, binge drinking is a problem. If you think you can take birth control and then binge drink and hope not to produce a [child with foetal alcohol syndrome], you may be very wrong. Sometimes these things don't work. Sometimes people forget. Sometimes they administer birth control improperly, and you might produce a fetal alcohol syndrome baby. That would be irresponsible of us until we get better information on that to say maybe that would be a good idea.’

Delightfully, the senator also addedthat ‘birth control is for people who don’t necessarily want to act responsibly.’

Now we're all for encouraging contraception and responsible attitudes towards drinking during pregnancy, but we can't really imagine a scenario where a. you suspect you're pregnant but think 'wait, no! I should really do a test before I down this tequila shot!' or b. seeing a pregnancy test next to your pint makes you think 'oh yeah, it has been ages since I last had my period.' Time and a place, people. A time and a place.

Follow Sophie on Twitter @sophiecullinane

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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