Is This Man an Asshole for Kicking His Girlfriend Out Over the Cat?

This Redditor kicked his girlfriend out of the house for letting his cat out - is he in the wrong?

Reddit man cat girlfriend

by Beth Ashley |

This Reddit scenario has the internet heavily invested. On the infamous ‘Am I the asshole?’ (AITA) where people bring their actions to trial-by-Reddit, a man is asking the internet jury whether he’s an asshole for kicking his girlfriend of two years out of the house they share.

At first glance, yes. Of course he’s an asshole, he’s made his girlfriend homeless. But there’s a little more to it.

A guy moved in with his girlfriend a few weeks ago, but they’ve been together a couple of years. Unfortunately, he’s a cat person and she clearly isn’t. His cat, Raven, is a house cat and never goes outside. But the poster’ girlfriend let him outside for a few hours, until he was returned by a friend from a few blocks away. After realising she let the cat out on purpose, the poster told her she had to leave their home. And now, he’s wondering if he made a bad decision.

Taking to Reddit, he posted the following:

‘So I have a cat named Raven who's 3 years old.

My girlfriend of 2 years moved in with me a few weeks ago and it was clear she didn't like my cat.

I didn't think it was really a big deal until one day I got home and he was just gone. He's not an outdoor cat and he never goes outside.

He was gone for hours and I was worried sick until my buddy came to my house and returned him, saying he found him 2 blocks from my house.

I asked my girlfriend how my cat, who has never tried to go out before, ended up that far from my house and she admitted to kicking him out.

I was furious, saying she had no right to kick him out and told her that since she thought she had the power to kick my cat out, I wanted her out of my house by the end of the month.

She cried that she had nowhere to go and that she would have to live on the streets. I said I didn't care and told her to leave by the end of the month.

My friends think I'm being too harsh, but my cat could have died because of her and I don't want her trying anything else.


The top comments under the thread heavily support the original poster. One of the comments reads ‘The cat was not there, simple as’ while another Reddit user responds with ‘’The cat was there first’ sounds so simple that it makes the gf seem crazy/entitled/chronically selfish. Which, she most likely is some combination of those. She kicked an innocent domesticated house cat outside. Didn’t tell OP. Then tried to avoid the situation until OP’s friend fortunately found said feline friendo, and returned it. The gf had zero compunction.’

Sure, the cat was there first - but this attitude says a lot about where the original poster - and the people defending him - are placing the girlfriend on their priority list. If you hold your cat above your girlfriend and move in without even discussing the cat and the rules around looking after him, you’re bound to run into some relationship issues.

This post has become so hotly - or rather, aggressively - debated, that a moderator had to switch off the comments and archive the thread not even one day after it was posted. The moderator commented “And so we come to the end of our journey. While the cat lover in me is happy to see so much support for adorable Raven, the moderator in me just can't let the continued insults fly (and there have been plenty). So we have to close this one out. OP - I think the majority is on your side.”

It’s true - the comments are overwhelmingly team OP/team cat, but we’re not sure it’s that simple.

Some commenters have taken things a little too far, suggesting the girlfriend’s behaviour is indicative of an evil or abusive personality. The same user continued his comment, adding ‘It would make me worry for the welfare of the cat in the future if said human remained in the residence’’

‘Hurting animals betrays a lack of character. If she’s willing to hurt your kitty, what else is she willing to do?’ is one comment under the post, while another user wrote ‘KEEP HER AWAY FROM YOUR CAT! She's going to hurt him, I guarantee it. Let him stay with someone until she's gone. NTA- this chick is psycho!’

We’re not going to lie - these accusations feel like a big reach. And if you’re not a big cat person (which the original poster specified his girlfriend wasn’t), would you even know that it isn’t necessarily okay to let a cat out? It’s a common misconception that all cats are somewhat wild, and they all walk themselves freely. But cat people are known for being pretty defensive of felines, and unforgiving of anyone who doesn’t vibe with them.

Despite what the comments say, we’re pretty sure this is an innocent mistake on the girlfriend’s part. And if he’s so upset about the cat living outside for a couple of hours a whole two blocks away from the house, why is he happy to turf his girlfriend out?

Ultimately, pets are a big part of people’s lives and you’d think over the course of a two year relationship you’d have a discussion about what pets mean to you and how you’d like to take care of them together, especially if one of you already has a pet before moving in together.

But what do you think? Is he an asshole, or is he right to ask her to leave?

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