Not to scare you or anything but choosing who you live with in your second year is a mahoosive life choice, and one that must be made with military precision. Like, do you live with that nice girl Sasha from your Lit Theory lecture, or the slightly-too-mental girls you always do pre-drinks with? What happens if your best mate from school gets upset if you don’t live with her? Fuck it, maybe you should just live with your boyfriend?
To avoid a Scream Queens-style blood bath (not watched it yet? Do it now, and be grateful/a little bit sad we don’t have sororities in the UK), here’s some pointers to help you navigate the politics of choosing your second year house.
HELP. The deadline for choosing is approaching. Fast.
If you’re super switched on/have mates in the year above, you’ll already know when you need to have made a decision by. If you’re not, we forgive you, you’ve had way more important things to worry about. Like, which really is the coolest club to go to on a Monday night, and did Lizzy down-the-corridor really get down and dirty with that guy YOU totally saw first? (Cow.) All very important concerns.
Word from the wise, though. It might be worth tearing yourself away from these huge life-determining questions to find out when people usually start sorting out their second year house. Otherwise, something really really really bad might happen. Like having to live in halls again and be the weird old one who lingers near the crisp machine and smells strongly of desperation.
But wait, it’s too early, I still can’t tell the difference between my fresher friends and my REAL friends…
No one wants to make the mistake of shacking up with the first friends they made during fresher’s week, but if you’re being too nice and still haven’t managed to ditch them, get a move on, gel. Many a great woman has been lost down this social suicidal path, never to return. (Or at least, not until third year, by which time it’s really too late.)
What if I’m still hanging out with loads of my mates from school? Can’t I just live with them?
Uni is for branching out. Cast your net far and wide and if you hate the mates you catch, just ditch them and return to the familiar company of your school friends in third year.
What happens if I’m a floater?
Ooooo, punchy of you to admit that. Well, dear floater, you’re in a particularly sticky situation. Running around like a social butterfly having drinks with every Tom, Tarquin and Harriet but never committing completely to one group might well leave you high and dry.
Here’s a solution: in true floater style, pick three friends from three of your groups and corner them each on a night out, making them promise to live with you. At least one of them will follow through/remember the next day…
Do I live with girls? Or boys and girls?
This is probably dependent on how your friendship group is weighted. Mixed boys and girls is fun, as long as the boys aren’t laddy. (Avoid. Avoid. Avoid.) If you have a big girl group make a splinter group, you don’t want to live in an eight-bedroom house with all of them. Have you ever been around that many girls when everyone’s periods are synced?
It’s a bloody nightmare (’scuse the...)
And when is the right time to make the decision?
Do you wait until near the deadline, to be sure you’ll still be friends? Or do you go in quickly to get a good house before they get snapped up? A risky game to play, kids. And one you have to judge for yourself.
What about the location. Near uni? Near town? Near your other mates?
This totally depends on your city. If you have a campus miles out of town, you probably don’t want to live near it. If your town is massive (and expensive), suburbs are the best option.
But help. What does where I choose to live say about me?
Everything. And each time you meet someone in the future who went to the same uni as you, they’ll ask where you lived. It will define you for the rest of your life. No pressure.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.