Users on Reddit have shared some valuable advice on what they've learnt from their first real relationship, and the answers are a bit heartbreaking but all in all great advice/affirmations that we did the right thing by not staying with our first love.
Here are 10 of the best/wisest.
1. 'You can convince yourself anything is fine if you don’t think you have any other options'
It's all too easy to convince yourself/be convinced that you won’t ever find anyone else, even though your current relationship is nothing but a giant shit storm, and that you’ll be alone forever if you leave this person. This is obviously untrue, and the second we realise we can do better is the second life gets better in general.
2. 'How incredibly important it is to find someone that is of, or around, the same emotional and mental maturity as you. Also, don’t ignore red flags'
When you're looking to go to University/are graduating/starting a pretty fancy job and your other half considers a productive day to be that they got high and ate six cheese toasties in a row, maybe it's time to consider where this relationship is seriously going and whether two people with such different mindsets should be together.
This user also hit us with an extra slice of wisdom, don't avoid red flags. If something feels wrong, it usually is. Don't waste your time on the 'but's. Butts, however, different circumstance.
3.'Your partner is your best friend, but shouldn’t be your only friend'
This sort of goes without saying- you should want to spend a lot of time with the person you love but should never be forced to do so, or forced to isolate yourself from your other pals.
4. 'The both of you can be perfectly good people, but that doesn’t always mean you’re good for each other'
This conjures up images of two people, one below the other's window, both smiling at eachother but in a very sad dramatic way because they don't want to end it but it has to. Sometimes, even if on paper it looks perfect, and you're both good, honest people, you bring out the worst in eachother, or just don't 'click' and it isn't meant to be.
5. 'The thought process directly following an orgasm is a surprisingly effective gauge for how much you love a person'
dicklemytick) (obviously)
This sounds like something Carrie Bradshaw, the worst advice giver/person ever, would definitely say, but it's worth thinking about.
6.' Someone can claim to be completely in love with you one day and wake up the next day wanting nothing to do with you. And its not always your fault'
Not fun, but that's life kids. Don't blame yourself if you did nothing wrong.
7. 'I deserve more than I always believed'
I want this on a tshirt.
8. 'Date someone who is into you both mentally and physically'
Obviously a great conversation is just as fun as looking at a hot bod.
9. 'It’s so incredibly important to know that everyone has flaws'
bpdexter85 at it again. In the words of Hannah Montana, 'nobody's perfect.'
10. "Instead of trying to find the one, BE the one." - 2 Chainz
This absolute corker of a wisdomous quote, posted by Finna22.
Thanks Reddit and also Mr. 2 Chainz.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.