Everyone probably already knew this, but there are these little sea sponges you can put up yourself that act as natural tampons. Known as menstrual sponges. People also call them, hilariously, ‘jam sponges’, and I immediately want to know absolutely everything about them because a) they sound halfway between tampons and mooncups on the You’renotputtingthatupmyvagina-o-Meter, and b) they're good for the environment, so I’m totally game.
Here’s everything you need to know about the tiny sponges of the sea that, in the words of Shakespeare, ‘Go up your faff when you’re blobbing.’ Because Shakespeare loved chatting about periods.
How do they work?
Sea sponges are incredibly absorbent and also washable, so you can reuse them for about 6-12 months, or until they begin to break apart. Because nobody wants a bit of sponge permanently inside them. Basically, you pop them up you when you’re on your period, then take them out and rinse them when you’d normally change your tampon. Thing is, they’re sponges, so they can be a little bit messy when you take them out. Sort of like a mooncup, I’d imagine, with all the period sloshing about, but instead of a cup it’s inside a cute little sponge. Oh, and make sure you add a little water to them before putting them in because when they come out of the packet they’re as dry as the bottom of Gandhi’s slippers. Just a bit of water makes them soft and supple, and they’ll fit whatever the size/shape of your vag.
How do you take them out?
With your fingers, babe. If you’ve never used a non-applicator tampon then you haven’t lived (alright I’ve used one and that’s an exaggeration, it was nothing more than fine), but this is pretty much the same. Except when you pull it out, you might accidentally squeeze period all over yourself, so it’s advisable to do it over a toilet. Then, in terms of rinsing it out, if you’re in a toilet with a sink you’re laughing. If you’re not, then you’ll need to wash it out using a bottle of water over the toilet. This level of organisation (ie having a bottle of water handy in my bag) renders it an impossible method of menstrual blood collection for me personally. But if you’re, like, a normal human who can plan ahead then go for it.
What happens on the in-betweeny days?
There’s an excellent review of sea sponges here, where the writer comments that during the tail end of her period, the sponge is a bit sticky. Coooool.
How do you clean them properly?
Yeah, good point, rinsing them a bit isn’t going to work long term. You need to regularly soak them in apple cider vinegar (don’t boil them, because they’ll break up a lot quicker), or, when you buy them in a kit, you sometimes get a special soak that’s OK to use. Whatever you soak them in, you need to make sure you fully rinse it out, otherwise you’re going to have it all over your cervix. Sorry.
Can I put googly eyes on them and call them different names?
If you like. But don’t then put them up yourself ,because googly eyes aren’t supposed to go inside humans.
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.