It’s Refreshing To Hear Celebs Like Kelly Clarkson Talk Honestly About Divorce

A few weeks ago Gwyneth Paltrow spoke out about the criticism and mockery she received when, upon announcing her divorce from Chris Martin, she used the phrase ‘conscious uncoupling’ (a term they picked up from their therapist). Writing about it in Vogue she said, ‘we knew that the piece would generate a lot of attention – a celebrity couple ending their relationship always does – but I never could have anticipated what came next. The public’s surprise gave way quickly to ire and derision. A strange combination of mockery and anger that I had never seen. I was already pretty tattered from what had been a tough year. Frankly, the intensity of the response saw me bury my head in the sand deeper than I ever had in my very public life.'

READ MORE: Gwyneth Paltrow And Chris Martin File For Divorce

It’s understandable - when you’ve worked hard to make something good out of something shit, and talked about it as personally as they did, you don’t expect the entire world to dump on you for it. But the problem is that for most people, when a relationship ends, when you have to divide up assets and get separate bank accounts, the enter into complicated, heartbreaking custody arrangements for your children, without a spenny therapist and separate Malibu beach houses to help you through it, it really is horrible.

So praise where it’s due for Kelly Clarkson, who has spoken honestly about her divorce from her ex husbandand manager Brandon Blackstock. The pair, who have two children, aged six and four, decided to split up during quarantine, and the end of the relationship has inspired Clarkson’s new album. Speaking on Sunday Today With Willie Geist and addressed how she was feeling directly.

"I mean, it's no secret, my life has been a little bit of a dumpster… personally, it's been a little hard the last couple months."

"I've been talking to friends that have been through divorce. I don't know how people go through that without having some kind of outlet because it is the worst thing ever for everyone involved."

She added that her upcoming music will address the split. "This next record, this will probably be the most personal one I've ever released," Clarkson said. "And the whole record is basically every emotion you experience from the beginning of a relationship to the end of what it is now, and it's been very therapeutic for me. It’s very honest.”

She’s right of course, in describing divorce as ‘the worst thing ever.’ That doesn’t necessarily mean the divorce in question was the worst thing for you, but along with bereavements and illness, a long-term relationship ending, especially (but not exclusively) when kids are involved, is one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to deal with. And that’s assuming you both agree that it’s time to split. Imagine how much harder the whole thing gets when one of you is desperate to try and make it work.

Not that you’d know any of this from most celebrity divorce announcements/press releases/iPhone notes screen grabbed onto Instagram. Whether it’s Gwyneth and Chris Martin’s conscious uncoupling or the many many celebrity ex-couples who have vowed to move forward together as co-parents and best friends, their breakups are as un-relatable as their post-lockdown yacht holidays.

And it matters because when you’re going through a messy, tricky breakup, when you’re feeling vulnerable, unsettled or are still arguing via lawyers over who gets to keep the cats, the last thing you want to see is someone else sail through their divorce or break up with total panache.

At the other end of the divorce spectrum is Lisa Armstrong, whose acrimonious split from Ant McPartlin was finalised in April. A box of McPartlin’s possessions were spotted outside her West London home this week with a sign telling people to ‘help yourself.’ And let’s face it, there’s nothing more relatable than trying and failing to get your ex husband to come and get his old football memorabilia from the attic.