‘I Can’t Seem To Put My Mind To Rest At Night’: 5 Expert-Approved Ways To Sleep Better

Can't sleep? Our experts are here to put that to bed...

Woman trying to sleep

by Georgia Aspinall |
Updated on

There’s a parenting meme going around right now that we particularly love. ‘How much sleep are you getting?’ it shows a friend asking. ‘Sometimes, when I sneeze, my eyes close for a second.’ If that isn’t all of us, every single day, for the last 10 months we don't know what is.

It might be the back to work stress, the fact we've been chained to our couches for the last couple of years or the rather unavoidable doom scrolling that we've felt subjected to recently, but for one reason or another, it seems like no one can sleep right now.

‘I can never sleep the week of a government announcement,’ says Lily, 27 from London. ‘so it’s really not ideal. I think everyone is the same to be honest, we’re just as stressed and anxious as ever and the burnout has gotten to us too. It’s really difficult to put your mind to rest at night.’

Lily isn’t wrong. According to UK's leading sleep expert, Dr Guy Meadows, increases in stress and mental health issues due to the past couple of years of on-and-off lockdowns are the main causes of sleep deprivation.

‘Our recent survey of the UK population highlights that the key factors disturbing the nation's sleep include increased stress levels relating to work, finances and relationships, as well as a worsening of mental health issues such as anxiety and depression,’ he explains. ‘People also report low physical exercise levels, poor diet and lack of socialising, as disturbing their sleep.’

That’s why Sleep School, the company dedicated to helping everyone sleep better has launched an app that offers users a range of support support from daily tips and advice to a 7-day audio-based series. There are also 30-day multimedia courses and private video sleep clinic bookings with a Sleep School doctor available.

So, what can we actually do about all this insomnia? Sleep hygiene might have been a term introduced way back in 1939, but it feels like something none of us have really taken seriously until now, when all of us are suffering the same insomnia-like symptoms. With stress at an all-time high, it’s more important than ever to start practicing healthy sleep that not only help us to fall asleep, but help us t stay asleep too.

With that in mind, we asked Sleep School co-founder Guy and international breathing coach Rebecca Dennis for their top tips on getting a good night’s sleep…

Go to bed and get up at the same time every night, even on the weekend

‘Keeping a regular sleep wake cycle helps to keep your internal body clock on time, strengthening the connection between your good quality sleep and the night-time,’ says Guy.

Get out of your head and into your bed

‘If you find yourself awake at night, connect to the present moment by describing the sense of physical contact between your body and the bed,’ Guy advises. ‘For example “Right now I can feel the pillow touching my cheek”. If your mind wanders onto thoughts, accept them and then come back to the body. Focusing on the sense of touch helps to anchor your mind's attention in the moment, rather than worrying about the past or future.’

Darken down 2 hours before bed

‘Research suggests that to achieve a better quality sleep it is best to dim the lights 2 hours before bed,’ adds Guy. ‘Reducing the brightness, scheduling blue light filters or taking a break from your digital devices, will also help.’

Practice breathing exercises before bed

According to international breathing coach and founder of Breathing Tree – a London-based yoga studio - Rebecca Dennis, there are also plenty of breathing exercises you can do either before bed, during the night or throughout the day to reduce stress enough for a good night’s sleep.

‘With insomnia rising at an alarming rate, sleep is considered something of a luxury rather than the necessary regular state we require to regenerate, heal and recharge,’ she says. ‘In order to get a good night’s sleep we need to stimulate the parasympathetic nervous system first. This will send messages to the body and mind that we are safe and can relax.

‘Try the 4-7-8 Technique. This breathing exercise can help you feel calm and stimulate the nervous system to a relaxed state. Begin by lying down in a comfortable position. Close your eyes. Press the tip of your tongue to the roof of your mouth, slightly open your mouth, and exhale until you reach the bottom of your breath. Close your mouth and quietly inhale through your nose for 4 counts. Then hold your breath for 7 counts. Exhale slowly and gently for a total of 8 counts to return to the bottom of your breath. Repeat for 4 full breaths, and work your way up to 8 breaths over time.’

Adopt daily breathing exercises too

She also recommends practicing the ‘Deep Diaphragmatic Breathing Exercise’ daily to reduce overall stress.

‘Relax your jaw, face and shoulders. Remember you don’t need to use your shoulder and neck muscles to breathe. You want your shoulders to stay down and relaxed. When you breathe in, the diaphragm contracts and flattens downward creating a vacuum that draws in air. When you exhale, the diaphragm returns to its dome shape, pushing air out of the body.

‘You can do this sitting up or lying down. Rest your hands on your lower belly so you can feel the breath expanding and moving through your body. Keep your spine long, feel your sitting bones on your seat and feet flat on the ground. Hold your head in a neutral position as if there is a thread at the centre of head holding it up towards the sky. Allow your throat to relax.

‘Breathe in slowly through your nose. Let the air flow as you inhale and expand your belly —expanding the sides and lower ribs, filling the diaphragm, back and lower back. Allow the deep inhale to push your belly out. Let the breath go with a gentle sigh through the nose or mouth on the exhale and feel the belly coming in. Don't force the air out, no need to push a river and simply allow it to flow in and out of the body.

‘Repeat this for 10 – 20 times and notice how you feel. By breathing deeply, you allow the diaphragm to drop downward, the ribcage to expand increasing oxygen flow in the body and helping the heart pace to slow down create feelings of calmness and relaxation.’

You can find out more about Rebecca’s breathing exercises on her new audiobook Breathe – which is beloved by celebrities like Fearne Cotton – dubbed a calm, practical audio guide to breathwork which will encourage positive shifts in mindset and connection. You can find a sneak peak of her work here...

Breathe, written and read by Rebecca Dennis, is published by Penguin Audio (£9.00). It is available via Audible, Apple Books, or Google Play.

Read More:

How To Sleep When You're In An Anxiety Spiral

Why Am I Having Such Vivid And Scary Dreams During The Coronavirus Pandemic?

Dreaming About Your Ex Is 25 Times More Common In Lockdown

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