So Facebook have launched their new anonymous chatroom app Rooms which is, as previously stated, basically exactly the same as those chat rooms you went on when your parents were downstairs - except it involves emojis. Download it, set up your own 'room', decorate it as you choose and have a chat about whatever you fancy. All anonymous, and you can only enter a room if you've been invited. Sort of like those chatrooms, then, but slightly more tailored so sexyguy8 doesn't butt into your convo about Harry Styles' manbun (or the upcoming American midterm elections) and ask if you'd like to cyber.
Anyway, here's what we're most looking forward to doing when Rooms really catches on and everyone's at it.
Using the word 'room' as a verb
Well it happened with Facebook, so if people actually use Rooms then who's to say we won't be talking about what so and so said when we were 'rooming'. Or saying sentences like 'Well why don't you room him?' and 'Rooming is so great' and 'Fancy a bit of roomage?'
Sorry we just vomited. Maybe this isn't something we're looking forward to.
Going vintage
OK this is genuinely exciting. Considering it's basically like a chatroom, we're hoping to be able to employ all the old classic tropes. Lurking around not saying anything except 'A/S/L' at odd points. Pretending to be from America. Saying you're a cheerleader called Emmy-Lou and only speaking in Taylor Swift lyrics until they catch on and leave. Obviously Taylor Swift wasn't about when we used to nail the chatrooms, but Boyzone lyrics worked pretty well too.
Creating incredibly niche rooms
'A discussion for the moment when you find the sock you thought you'd lost and realise you've thrown the original sock away once you lost all hope of finding its mate' for example. Or 'Christina Aguilera's toe'. And then inviting loads of people and seeing how many accept. Basically, not using it to speak about anything important but instead conducting constant social experiments to see how people react to Christina Aguilera's toe.
Pretending to be other people and freaking out your friends
I once really fancied someone and we created a Teenchat room with a secret password after school so we could all chat. He said he would log in. Sure enough, at 6.05 'Luke' did indeed log in and I got so excited until I found at the next day that he hadn't logged in, and it was my mate playing a prank on me. Thank god I played it cool and didn't private message him or flirt too much but what if I had? Basically, I want to do this to other people. And pretend I'm Miley Cyrus as well. I think people would believe it because it's the internet.
Cybersexing
Remember cybersexing with a guy who was definitely actually three girls giggling over a laptop in one of their bedrooms while you pretending to be called Emmy Lou and a teenager from California? No? Why am I the only one to have had these very specific experiences? Anyway, while Chat Roulette can be a bit much (especially if you're eating), there's nothing better than having a cyber sesh when you're drunk and you want to see how weird someone can be. Obviously don't give out any private details. Maybe this is irresponsible but, hey, if it's anonymous it might be interesting to give it a whirl and see how much the world has changed since the early 00s, right?
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.