It’s easy to notice fat people. Just like it’s easy to notice thin people, or people who for whatever reason are a bit different. But, though we might share space with people who look a bit different, doesn’t mean they’re there for us to ogle or shout at or look down on. However, as much as we all pretty much know it’s a dickheadish thing to treat someone differently for the way they look, it’s still a source of enjoyment for bored pricks out there.
Sofie Hagen, a 25-year old comedian, has helped us get a little insight into what it feels like to be shamed for being fat.
The sad thing is, though she incorporates fat jibes and weight jokes into her shows, the way she let us – and thousands of others – into her experience of being fat-shamed, this time it was by way of a Facebook status.
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What was ‘meant to be a four-sentences-long anecdote with a jolly lil' punchline’ ended up being a longer story about how she was shouted at by some strangers at Kennington tube station in London. In the post, which has recieved almost 1,000 likes, she explained: ‘Three drunk guys walked past me. One of them started making kissing sounds towards me as one of the other guys said: "Oi, fat cunt, he fuckin' loves ya, he just wants to kiss you, fatso!" and then they laughed and walked away.’
Her response? Well, she did ‘what I have been taught is best. I sat quietly, looking in the opposite direction, pretending that I did not hear anything they had said.’
She then explained how this is the expected response of someone, especially a woman, who gets shouted at in public simply for being herself. Sofie also detailed how that one incident undid nine years of therapy she underwent to feel more comfortable about her body and that the next day she found herself wanting to go on a crash diet. Not because she actually wants to be slim, but so that people stop abusing her in the street: ‘I was fine with being fat and now I want to be skinny for the SOLE REASON that I don't like being abused in the street.’
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She added that the guys will think they can get away with it, primarily because they’ll target people who have been told not to speak up: ‘I am angry that I cannot shout at them, because I am woman and I am scared I will get beaten up. Because I have learned to not make a fuss, to not be a “crazy bitch.” I am so, so angry that they will do this to other women, who will just accept it as a fact, that they are not worthy of love and respect.’
The saddest part is, as well as those guys thinking they can get away with it, is the lack of support Sofie feels. As well as a ‘friend’ telling her: ‘Just don't go outside on a Friday night,’ she paints a picture of how bleak things are for her, socially, saying: ‘If I had to stop being friends with everyone who was fatphobic, I would have very few friends.’
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We might not be able to stop those louts from being pricks to Sofie, or undo all of the fatphobic,or whatever-phobic comments we hear every day, but maybe we can all be that more supportive by being kinder to all those different people close to us.
You might also be interested in:
Stranger Shaming: How Being A Woman Eating On A Tube got Me 12,000 Online Haters
Here's Why Putting Couples Carrying Out Public Sex Acts In The News Needs To Stop
Follow Sophie on Twitter @sophwilkinson
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.