Emily Atack: If You’re Single In Lockdown, Support Bubbles Only Mean One Thing

The moment the phrase ‘support bubble’ left the prime ministers mouth, I laughed. I’m not really sure why. I took straight to Twitter to make a joke about it. It sounded so made up. Like the sort of phrase you’d make up in the school playground, and people need a password to get into your little gang. I giggled every time he said the word “bubble” ... again, I don’t really know why. I guess it’s the sort of word you wouldn’t really expect the leader of your country to say. The word ‘bubble’ is a funny word. Like you wouldn’t expect him to ever have to say the word ‘fart.’

Yet beneath my childish sense of humour, those two words - support bubble - have come to be the most important words in my life at the moment. After all, these new lockdown-lifting measures are massively aimed at people who are living alone. Single parents perhaps, an elderly grandparent dying to see their grandchildren. Or a young single woman DYING for a snog and a topless roll around (cough cough!)

Lockdown is slowly lifting, and I am gradually (perhaps naively?) feeling a sense of normality creeping back in to my life again. I have seen friends, seen family. had take away pints from my local pub and enjoyed breathing in the familiar smell of the kegs and casks for those few seconds of ordering and taking the drinks away. I’ve even visited a few little shops.

Up until now it’s been a journey ( sorry, I hate that word , too!) ‘being strong’ in my solo and very chaste world of trying to stay optimistic despite not seeing /touching anyone. And throughout, I have stuck to the rules, and have taken in the severity of the situation every single day. I want to make that clear.

But when my friends ask the question ‘Who is in your support bubble ?’ it has now become a sort of euphemism for

‘Who are you having round for a shag?’ Ok I’ll just be honest and say my friends didn’t even sugarcoat it with the support bubble bollocks. They simply just said out right ‘who are you having round for a shag?’

Emily Atack: Isolating When You're Single

So here I am once again being reminded how single I am - and as I've said before nothing wrong with being single - but now I’m in a sodding bubble!

The thing is, there’s nothing about bubbles that doesn’t sound a) rude or b) ridiculous And also: it’s NOT AS SIMPLE AS THAT! You have to choose your bubble carefully and legally. If you are alone, you must choose just ONE person who is allowed to come into your bubble, and you are allowed to behave as though you are now an official household (no pressure fellas!!) You also have to try not offend your family by choosing a 6ft 5” model aged 25 rather than your lovely mother or father. I can’t promise anything guys.

You’re Either A Baker Or A Boozer in Lockdown – And Emily Atack Is A Boozer

texts handsome would-be suitor

‘I’d blow your bubble.. ‘

‘I can be your support bubble baby.. ‘

See what I mean? It’s impossible not to be silly about it! But I’ll stop being negative. Let’s look at the positives. I’m healthy, covid free and so pleased to see the restrictions gradually being lifted ... it’s just this bloody Bubble word I’m struggling to take seriously.

There again, I’ve frequently been described as having a bubbly personality, so maybe it’s the perfect fit.

Just need someone to come and burst it. Sorry. Couldn’t help myself.