This Douche Is Selling His Ex-Girlfriend On Gumtree

South African man offers his ex-girlfriend up for sale along with the bike that he bought to please the keen cyclist when they were together...

gumtreegirlfriend

by Sophie Wilkinson |
Published on

We get that it can be totally draining when you have to sacrifice parts of your life to appease someone you’re in a relationship with, so we feel the pain of the guy who felt like he had to buy a bicycle just because his girlfriend was into cycling.

And we understand that he now wants to sell the two-wheeled reminder of his broken relationship via Gumtree. He wrote in the item’s description: ‘Bought this bike because my girlfriend was into cycling,’ reports The Mirror.

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‘She dumped me and I hate cycling. I’ve used it twice since I bought it. Apparently it’s quite a good bike.’

However, for him to offer up the phone number of his ex, and, um, his ex herself, is pretty creepy and gross: ‘I'll throw in some size 9 specialized shoes for good measure along with the ex’s phone number if you ever feel like being taken for a ride.’

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Of course, the pun shows that the man, posting from Cape Town, South Africa, can make a dig at himself, but even if he is joking with the offer of his ex’s phone number, it totally plays into the idea that her number, and her, are up for grabs to the highest bidder. Which is an attitude so old-fashioned and grim, it should have stayed way back in whichever century it was the bicycle was invented (the 19th, fact fans).

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It’s not exactly revenge porn, but legitimising that idea that jilted blokes are allowed to offer part of their ex’s sex and sexuality up to whoever wants it is so fucked up. It’s an ‘If I can’t have it, everyone can have it’ mentality that makes absolutely no sense unless you’re a dick who thinks that women are property.

And besides, he should probably keep the bike. Cycling is a really great way to clear your mind and a perfect thing to keep you from spending your time writing mean things on the internet.

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Follow Sophie on Twitter @sophwilkinson

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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