This Armadillo Is Struggling To Shift Her Christmas Weight

If you call me ‘The Holiday Armadillo’ one more goddam time…

This Armadillo Is Struggling To Shift Her Christmas Weight

by Beatrice Murray-Nag |

Piling on the pounds over Christmas happens to the best of us, and the struggle is real for Gretel, a young armadillo from East Sussex who just can’t shift her holiday weight.


After over-indulging in festive treats including bugs, eggs and vegetables, Gretel has been put on a strict diet. Sick of the constant bodyshaming, she’s determined to shift her binge-eating bulge.

Drusillas Zoo Park has tweeted a picture of the chubby armadillo tucking into a bowl of veggies (we feel your pain, girl) announcing that she’s on a ‘health-kick’ for the New Year. It’s important for her to shift the extra pounds since the regular insect-binging is putting her wellbeing in danger.

Poor Gretel needs to loose an eighth of her body weight, but like many of us January detoxers she’s struggling with her slow metabolism.

‘She loves her food but does put on weight easily,’ says Gretel’s spokesperson Mark Kenward, head keeper at the zoo. ‘We’ve made adjustments to her eating plan, combined with a little more exercise.’

Gretel has been seen regularly working out in the park’s Discovery Centre. It’s unknown whether she prefers yoga or Pilates.

Despite being a little overweight, the park’s visitors seem to love a curvy girl and she’s still a very popular attraction. Commenting on her health, Mark says, ‘We’re not unduly concerned at the moment, but we’ll be keeping a close eye on her over the coming months.’

We tried to contract Gretel to ask her how much she actually weighed, and received this response.

‘I’d really rather not answer that right now, I’m still carrying a little holiday weight.’

Like this? You might also be interested in:

How To Detox The Right Way Without Feeling Like Crap

4 Actually Scientific Reasons Why Our New Year’s Resolutions Fail

Here’s The Most Bonkers Health Foods You’re Going To Be Eating In 2016

Follow Beatrice on Twitter @beatricemn_

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.

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