It’s 4.15am and I smell weed. My boyfriend has been tossing and turning for hours and has finally crept out of bed into the dead of night, ripped a bong and slid back under the covers without trying to wake me. But my nose twitches. I ask him if he’s smoked, he denies it and takes refuge under the covers. We’re both far too familiar with that smell for any real pretense. He is a self-confessed drug addict.
According to Frank, 10% of regular marijuana smokers become hooked after regular use. Leave your stereotypes behind though because drug addicts aren’t always slurring words and robbing little old ladies – however, there are definite highs and lows when you’re cohabiting with one.
1. You’ll stop noticing when he is and isn’t high
I have absolutely no idea when my boyfriend is stoned. Naturally I smoke now and again, so I know the signs, but I frequently witness him smoking and then carrying out everyday activities which I (and many others) would be unable to do. He’s a master of disguise (he gets excited when he sees bargain eye drops in Poundland), wonderfully eloquent and quick-witted and I want to have sex with him all the time – he’s delicious. But how can he keep up appearances and still maintain his constant daily smoking?
Although I am partially sighted to the side effects of his smoking, I live a life of wonder and mentally quiz myself on our time together: how often is he stoned around me? Does he have to be high to talk to me? Is he baked when we’re fucking? Some people start their day with a coffee, he rips a bong, do I make shit coffee?
2. He becomes a financial tight arse
A recent talk about money led to the revelation that he spends over £40 a week on a bag, but justifies that by saying others spend more down the boozer. That may be factually accurate, but then again the local drunks down the pub are embarrassing themselves publicly, not hidden away at home. He can do what he wants with his money, but when he begins to forget he has a wallet it’s time to cut that 40 quid down.
3. You’ll accidentally become a mule
On one fateful trip to the motherland, Amsterdam, he had some ‘very nice’ hash. We forgot it was on him and carried it across central Europe. Evidently, we did not become the Amsterdam Two...
4. He’ll be a miserable fuck when going cold turkey
Oddly enough, I’ve recently discovered it’s a bit shit when he goes cold turkey. Mental health problems can be a result of years of smoking and I’m beginning to see the early signs. Grumpy, short-tempered and defeatist, we had a memorable argument over which direction to cycle down a river during one of his dry spells. I blame the weed, not my navigational skills.
5. You realise maybe you’re not helping at all
It can be difficult to articulate to an addict how you feel, as there are always answers to questions you ask and annoying justifications, so I recently wrote him a letter explaining my concerns. I was promised a 60-day, no-weed lifestyle, however by day two it was over and we shared a spliff. So I ask, am I the problem?
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.