29 Non-Shit Quotes About Love

The iconic, acerbic West might have been a millennial renter in London in another life.

Maya Angelou's vision of love sounds like an eager labrador, and there's nothing much lovelier than that.

The Master of None reminding us that before there was Netflix, lovers only had the stars.

The first lady of rom-com may have given us false expectations of email, radio phone-ins and salt beef sandwiches, but she knew how to deliver a truth bomb too.

Because there's the need for love and the need for a burrito, and who is to say which is better?

While Freud was busy making everything about sex, his old rival had a more romantic take on things.

Comedian Maria Bamford, hitting on a new niche fetish for the gluten-free age.

Forster's novel of same-sex love in the early 20th century wasn't published until after his death, but it had a beautiful message for anyone who's ever felt trivial or bewildered in the romance game. Which is probably all of us.

Suddenly we want to live in the People's Republic of Carrie Fisher's Love even more than Stoke Newington.

Before we had Fleabag or Bridget Jones, there was Charlie Brown. The Peanuts gang may have been kids (and a beagle), but between them they knew enough about the ways of the heart to put most adults to shame.

Write it on the back of your hand, in case you forget.

The inimitable Schumer, helping out everyone who can't quite their finger on it.

The Nobel Prize-winning author, turning the cliche upside down in her novel Jazz.

The wisest Simpson there, with your go-to line for when that woman in your office gets a huge bouquet delivered.

Let's listen to Nina and remember that sometimes the hardest part of love, like an all-you-can-eat buffet, is knowing when it's time to walk away.

The Vanity Fair author, helpfully legitimising all those times you've fallen in love with an obnoxious heartbreaker, an unattainable dreamboat or the back of somebody's head on the bus.

The groundbreaking diarist and erotic author, on why love isn't really so different from your Ikea spider plant.

One for everyone who has ever known that in-love-with-the-world-today feeling. We still miss you, Amy.

Grand dame Joan Crawford, bringing a whole new meaning to the instruction 'drop and roll'.

Is there any more powerful image to pick you up after a break-up than Staceyann Chin's?

The poet's take on love is more painful and beautiful than most. They don't make a special Nurofen for it either.

Michelle Obama's marriage advice for young couples is about as real and gorgeous as you'd expect.

The peerless Ms Parker, with an alternative 'roses are red, violets are blue' to pop on your fridge.

Steinem at her finest, Steinemest, with a solid strategy to help whittle down your Tinder matches.

It's mostly digital admin these days Pearl, but you're still 100% right.

Ellen there, raising the important question of where homophobia and owning a Lamborghini with a spoiler might cross over on a venn diagram.

It might not be practical, but you can't say Z-Fitz's strategy wasn't romantic as hell.

Shaw called it before Elizabeth Gilbert did – a relationship with pizza is the purest love of all

Can we get an amen?