ICYMI last night Loose Woman host Jamelia stated that ‘plus-sized clothing should not be made available on the high-street, only specialist stores, whilst the panel were discussing Channel 4 documentary Plus Sized Wars. She has met with immense backlash, and rightly so. Shaming bigger women out of high-street stores is discriminating, and making overweight people feel uncomfortable is not the way to promote a healthy body and mind.
And yet, I’m torn when it comes to her comments.
You see, I’ve experienced first-hand the lack of clothing the high-street has for bigger women – at 18 I was a size 16– and I don’t think most retailers need any more encouragement to shame these plus-size women. Back when I was at my largest, I watched in envy as my smaller friends were trying on Topshop denim shorts, as I sat outside as the ‘bag-watcher.’ It wasn’t just the range of sizes that bothered me - everything was just either small or big, with no consideration of different body shapes. I've since lost five stone, and I struggle with my weight, and body image as much now as I did when I was bigger – if not more.
Which is why as much as I disagree with what Jamelia said, I empathise with Jamelia and the backlash she received. I myself have been attacked for my views on plus-size fashion, vilified for believing its damaging to promote unhealthy body sizes, from both ends of the spectrum. Like Jamelia, who also stated that she wants to celebrate people for who they are, I too have found my voice in the past silenced by those who disagree with my views.
I do think obesity in the UK needs to be addressed, and I worry that people are being silenced for their views on the matter in fear of offending. After all, who wants to be compared to Katie Hopkins?
And equally, I’m aware that size doesn’t equate health. After all, I’m incredibly unfit, while I know plus-sized women who are the pictures of health. Weight nowadays is discussed as such a black and white thing. If you’re fat, you’re unhealthy, if you’re skinny you’re also unhealthy, if you’re in between, you’re just lucky. Reasons people are overweight, underweight or otherwise aren’t ever considered, and it’s easy to pigeon-hole someone without truly considering all aspects of their life.
It’s not just the media, women themselves body-shame each other on a daily basis. It’s not just Jamelia’s thoughtless comment, it’s the people who tell me I’m fat and ugly after TV appearances, it’s the women on Twitter arguing with one another over size and appearance. Every aspect of our bodies are judged and scrutinised, and the results are damaging.
READ MORE: We Spoke To The Ace Blogger Changing Body Perceptions In New Documentary Plus-Sized Wars
I wasn't happier when I was bigger, so it wrong for me to have these views? I was bullied terribly, which lead to anxiety and depression, and I never felt good about myself. I was also unhealthy, unfit, and got out of breath easily. I didn’t eat the right foods, and suffered with terrible chaffing and back problems because of the extra weight I was carrying. Now that I’m thinner, am I happier? Yes, and I shouldn’t be ostracised for that either.
It’s fantastic to see the confidence the women on Plus Sized Wars have, it’s something that I never did. I didn’t have these plus-sized bloggers and models to look up to as a teenager and there weren’t communities like there are now that allows women to be happy with who they are, and I bet you anything, there are still women and young girls out there now who are as unhappy and alone as I was.
There’s no community for women like me, the 21 year old who works tirelessly to keep slim, yet will always struggle with my weight. I know people will say, oh it’s easy for you, but everyday I wake up and look at my body in the mirror, pulling at the fat on my stomach wishing it was more toned, stroking my tired, spotty skin wishing I had a flawless complexion, staring at other women on Instagram, wishing I had their face, their confidence, their popularity.
It’s so easy to split women into communities, you and ‘the other’, but it’s not right. It turns women against each other for their opinions when at the end of the day we should be building one another up. Is it right to fat-shame people out of wearing the latest trends because of their weight? Of course not. But is it right for some plus-sized women to skinny-shame others? Again, no.
No, I don’t agree with Jamelia’s views, but at the same time I respect the overarching comment she was trying to make about leading healthy lifestyles. Whether someone’s a size 6, or size 24 and up, if they have a healthy mind, diet and active lifestyle, then what’s the problem? With the extremely low self-esteem witnessed in young women nowadays we should be encouraging women to love themselves, and one another, regardless of their ethnicity, shape or disability, and whether they love their weight or want to lose it. Instead we’ve created a culture of categorising people, pitting women of different sizes against each other - and that’s the most damaging thing of all.
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The Realities Of Shopping On The High Street When You’re A Size 24
The Complications Of Being A Fat Girl And Still Loving Fashion
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This article originally appeared on The Debrief.