It eclipsed Myspace, MSN and Faceparty, it's a source of crippling anxiety and heartache and it’s become the epitome of online behaviour that we love to hate. So it’s time to celebrate 10 years of Facebook.
But while we love dropping fascinating Facebook facts – like the fact that the guy who first painted their office chose to get paid in shares rather than cash and he’s now worth over $200million – we also love to agonise/bitch/laugh/eye-roll about the fact that it’s made us a generation of narcissistic internet obsessed millennials.
Here’s how our attitude to Facebook has changed over the last decade:
WALL POSTING
Then: Ooh someone’s posted on my ‘wall’! Oh, and it notifies you! This is cool. I think I might catch up with Katie who I sat next to in geography when I was in high school, she was great, I wonder what’s going in her life…
Now: Argh! These notifications are making my phone battery die! How do you turn them off? And why does Katie keep posting inane crap? WHY would I give a shit that she just bought a new dog? Do I have to reply to her? Think I might block her.
PROPOSALS
Then: Awww, my ex-neighbour has just got engaged! That is lovely! Is there a way to like this status? And will she see if I congratulate her? I hope she puts a picture of herself and the ring.
Now: Jesus eff, ANOTHER wedding announcement?! Think I’ll write a passive aggressive statement about how dry people in relationships are.
PHOTO ALBUMS
Then: I can’t believe how addictive posting pictures on the internet is! I’m excited to document nights out with my friends. Now I can prove I actually have a life!
Now: OK, I will almost certainly get ridiculed for this gratuitous duckface/pouting selfie, but I couldn’t give a shit because I look hot.
LINKING TO NEWS ARTICLES
Then: Here’s a cool news link people might enjoy about the awful conditions of Nike workers in Indonesia. Maybe we can start an online petition to get people involved!
Now: The next person to post an over-earnest ‘clicktivism’ link is getting immediately de-friended. Don’t even get me started on Kony-gate.
FACEBOOK CHAT
Then: Oh, someone wants to chat to me on the new Facebook chat function! This could be the start of a wonderful new friendship, I bet it’s as fun as MSN Messenger!
Now: Jeeez, can’t a girl just idly looking at starnger’s wedding pics at 1am without being met with badly spelled sexual advances over the internet? Another day, another ‘lukin sexci babe ;)’ message from someone I hardly know.
EVENTS
Then: Ooh, this events calendar seems like a useful thing for me to know about! I can schedule events, I bet that will really organise me.
Now: GO AWAY WITH YOUR DOGSHIT EVENT INVITES. I HATE YOUR FLYER AND YOUR MUSIC AND YOUR VERY CORE.
TAGGING
Then: Oh riiight, the ‘tag’ means that you can highlight the other people in the picture! That’s a good feature. We can all have pictures of each other in our albums!
Now: Why has this person I hardly know tagged me in their picture? In fact, why are we even friends? How has she even infiltrated my friend list? While we’re on the topic, the next person to tag an ugly picture of me is getting tagged with a picture of a pile of horse poo. (Do we sound a bit bitter yet?)
SPOOKY ADVERTISING
Then: Oh look, that’s so weird! There is an advert in the sidebar about Netflix and I was just posting a status about what I’m watching on Netflix.
Now: Holy Christ, in what terror-filled world would I want to look at a single dating advert on my facebook page THE DAY AFTER I’ve broken up with my boyfriend? Facebook you are the source of all evil. Clicks anyway
As we said, online behaviour we love to hate.
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.