Finally We Know The Truth About Casual Sex (Thanks To A New Study)

*This is your weekly instalment of WTF is going on because, these days, a lot can happen in a week…*This is your weekly instalment of WTF is going on because, these days, a lot can happen in a week…

It's safe to say this has been a busy week in news - there was Spreadsheet Phil's Spring Statement (growth is weak, they want to scrap 1p and 2p coins and you probably still can't buy a house), a new (old) Cold War with Russia which is enough to make anyone feel more than a little uneasy and then Zayn and Gigi broke up- so there's no shortage of stuff to talk about.

Sure, social justice journalism, long form investigations and pithy political pieces are my jam but, to tell you the truth, the story I'm about to tell you is what I live for. This week we're going to talk about a newly released study that you may have overlooked while you were busy googling whether or not we're currently levitating on the cusp of a Putin-themed Third World War (we're not, it's OK).

Here, ladies and gentlemen, we have an age-old story about everyone's favourite global epidemic: sexism.

A groundbreaking (I write this with my tongue firmly in my cheek) study from the Norwegian University of Science and Technology and the University of Texas has found that…wait for it…young women are less likely to regret casual sex if they made the first move. More than this, young women are even less likely to regret that casual sex if 'the partner was skilled, and they felt sexually satisfied'.

The intrepid researchers behind this shocking (my tongue is going to get stuck here if the wind changes) study interviewed 547 Norwegian and 216 American heterosexual university students. In doing so, they found that their female subjects, all of whom were under 30, did not regret good casual sex that they wanted to have.

For all women everywhere, this is hardly news, but it speaks to a bigger problem - the puritanical stinking stigma that surrounds women who enjoy sex outside of a monogamous relationship.

'Women who initiate sex are likely to have at least two distinguishing qualities', said Professor David Buss from the University of Texas. He added, 'first, they are likely to have a healthy sexual psychology, being maximally comfortable with their own sexuality. Second, women who initiate have maximum choice of precisely who they want to have sex with. Consequently, they have less reason to feel regret, since they've made their own choice'.

The results, his colleague Joy P. Wyckoff from the University of Texas went on to say are 'another reminder of the importance of women's ability to make autonomous decisions regarding their sexual behaviours'.

Tell us something we don't know. The fact that such a study has recently been conducted and made headlines news surely tells us something about our attitudes to sex today.

A good litmus test for whether something is sexist is to flip it on its head and see if it works when you put a man in the position of a woman. What do you call a woman who 'sleeps around'? She is, at best, 'drunk', occasionally 'empowered' and at worst, more often, 'a slut', 'insecure', 'troubled', saddled with 'daddy issues' or, perhaps if you're being generous, a 'hot mess'. What do we say about men who do the same? 'Boys will be boys' or he's such a 'player'. Women who dare to express sexual desire beyond the confines of monogamy are still somehow promiscuous or, as Iago puts it in Othello 'lascivious'. Meanwhile, men are given as much leeway as they need to 'sow their wild oats' and 'get it out of their system'… even when they're by far the oldest person in the club by at least 15 years…Yes, we see you. The dim lighting isn't fooling anyone.

**READ MORE: The Debrief Investigates - Hormonal Contraception And Mental Health **

This perverse double standard is well established and, like a red wine stain in your favourite white top, it just won't budge. Not for all the feminism in the world. Arguably, we've come a long way: mums everywhere dragged their millennial daughters to see the softcore S&M fantasy 50 Shades of Grey in their friendly local cinema, nobody bats an eyelid at premarital sex, oral sex is more or less standard and yet, we still seem to be somewhat conflicted about whether or not it's ok to have casual sex, let alone enjoy it for its own sake.

'Don't sleep with him on the first date or he'll never call you again' has got to be one of the most damaging and pervasive myths of all time. The reasonably radical Series 3 episode of Sex and the City, Are We Sluts, which aired in 2003 ought to feel dated now but it's as relevant as ever. In this episode, Carrie can't understand and is frustrated by the fact that Aidan won't have sex with her because he is an 'old-fashioned romantic'. This provokes her to ponder whether she and her fancy-free pals 'are sluts'?

This is a familiar trope: true love waits, it is never overtly sexual. Instead it is always considered and reserved. It's well and truly time to call BS on this notion. It's time to advocate good sex for its own sake, to make pleasure synonymous with romance. Because, let's face it, beyond a one-night stand or casual fling - if you are going to embark on a lifetime of monogamy with one person good sex is crucial.

Back in 2009, researchers from Stanford and Indiana University found that heterosexual women had orgasms only half as often as the men they hook up with, and only a third of those would orgasm during their first sexual session with a new partner. The problem is not casual sex, it's the inequality that still exists when it comes to casual sexual encounters.

Dr Zhana Vrangalovaan New York-based sex researcher has dedicated much of her time debunking the mythology of hook ups in the form of The Casual Sex Project. In her TED Talk Is Casual Sex Bad for You? She puts it best:

'Men need to learn to be more giving, try harder to please their partners, even in the briefest of one-night stands. You know, casual sex doesn't have to be devoid of all intimacy and passion. It's not like you're doing laundry or picking up your mail. Try to give and get as much sexual pleasure out of every hook up. That's the whole point'.

If Woke Charlottehas taught us anything it's that Sex and the City feels anachronistic today in almost every single way so it's telling that, when it comes to casual sex, our attitudes don't seem to have evolved at all. The fact that this study even qualifies as news is proof of that. Casual sex is yet another arena where we still need to drastically redress the gender balance.

Follow Vicky on Twitter @Victoria_Spratt

This article originally appeared on The Debrief.