If you’ve been anywhere on the interwebs today, you’ve probably seen the letter received by an Australian mum from her anonymous Facebook ‘friends’ telling her off for putting up loads of pictures of her baby.
ATM, I’ve got no idea what it’s like to have kids. I have no idea how much joy I’ll feel when I’ve got a little version of me walking around, vomming down herself and pooing her pants every five minutes and so, I kind of get where this lady’s ‘friends’ are coming from.
Kind of.
Because while I can appreciate an onslaught of baby pictures on your feed is kind of annoying, I’ve got absolutely no right to comment on it because the most impressive thing I’ve ever done is turn down that last drink on a Saturday night because I want to get up and make the most of the next day.
The baby picture-posting people though? They’ve created LIFE. An actual human life. And, chances are, if I ever manage to do something that impressive, I’m going to be the most irritating human being that’s ever been on social media ever.
Plus, an anonymous letter? C’mon guys. Is this school? Just get her drunk and mention it. Don’t be dicks. See also the ‘unfollow’ button. It’s there for your use, free of charge.
Anyways, here’s some stuff that’s WAY more annoying on Facebook than baby pictures.
Putting a kiss at the end of everything
Like, what even. ‘Just been to see the Hunger Games x’, ‘Can’t wait for girls’ night on Saturday x’, and the more perplexing; ‘glass of wine and early to bed x’. Who are you directing your kisses at, ladies? There’s people on my Facebook I wouldn’t even recognise IRL, let alone snog.
Sponsored posts from brands that promote stuff that isn’t a thing
I mean, obviously, the brand *is *a thing, otherwise it wouldn’t be using Facebook to promote its wares. The only trouble is that us non-clued-up laymen and women have no idea what your multi-media sales app content based platform sharing user experience is. So go away.
People sharing old things
And by old I mean like, two weeks old. Like c’mon. There’s no excuse for sharing a two-week-old video of a celebrity falling up the stairs at an awards do. Although, rather than being annoyed at your ignorance, we’re more annoyed by the fact that you’ve got enough of a life IRL that you don’t really give a shit about the day-to-day goings on of celebrities. You lucky sod you.
‘Dear…’ rants
Like, ‘Dear people on the tube who don’t move down inside the carriage when other people are trying to get on’, ‘Dear overweight people wearing no clothes in the park’, ‘Dear lady at the bus stop yelling at her son’. Dear Facebook friend. I’ve unfollowed you. Sincerely yours, your biggest fan, Stan.*
*The irony that this is essentially one big ‘dear’ rant is not lost on me BTW.
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Picture: Ada Hamza
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.