‘Taking My Makeup Off In Front Of 4 Million People At The BRITs Was The Scariest Thing I’ve Ever Done’

Even as someone who used to go to performing arts school, if somebody told me a few years ago I would be taking off my make-up on live TV as part of the UK’s biggest award ceremony, I would have applied some lipstick and laughed straight in their face. But that’s what happened earlier this week, when I wiped my face completely clean during Jess Glynne’s stunning performance of Thursday at the BRIT awards.

It was only last week when I replied to a casting advert looking for young women to take part in a live TV project. The details were pretty sparse – but I figured it would be exciting, so I took a chance and applied, sending over some headshots (where I was most definitely wearing make-up.) I didn’t really think anything of it until I received an email saying that I’d been picked, and even then, it wasn’t only early this week that I discovered I’d be one of the girls taking off her make-up during Jess Glynne’s set. At the bloody BRIT awards of all places!

For those of you who haven’t seen, Jess has been widely praised for her performance on Wednesday night, where she removed her makeup on stage while singing her new single, Thursday. She was joined by American singer songwriter H.E.R and 70 girls and women who were all taking their makeup off too – one of whom was me.

I first found out about the concept on the Monday morning, when we had one rehearsal. Set designer Es Devlin has said that the concept came from a statistic that found that forty per cent of girls who spend over five hours per day on social media show symptoms of depressing. The idea was that the visual impact of all of us removing every inch of our makeup live on stage that evening, with millions of people watching would resonate with young women and raise awareness of these shocking stats.

Before I knew the details of the routine, I was quite worried I would have to dance, but to be honest, when I found out what was actually going to happen, the thought of taking off my make-up was far more scary. It’s very rare that I don’t wear make-up in public, but now, literally everyone I knew was going to see me bare-faced – it’s not as if I have any hair to hide behind! Going make-up free to work, where I’m a waitress, is daunting enough. But in an arena with Little Mix, Dua Lipa – and Shawn Mendes? Jog on!

On the day we spent hours and hours beforehand rehearsing at the O2. Jess was lovely and down-to-earth, and it was so exciting to work through the routine with the production crew. As the clock ticked closer and closer to showtime, my nerves started to rack up. The buzz and atmosphere became overwhelming as the crew started get the arena Brits ready.

There was a make-up artist on set, so I took a risk and asked for bold blue eye make-up. It seemed like a bit of waste asking for a look I knew would be taken off. As I have really short hair, I love to wear really bold eyeliner and have all attention on my eyes. I never wear false eyelashes, but I was told I needed to rip them off for the show as this is what Jess would be doing.

To remove it all, we were given reusable pads and Votary’s £45 Rose Geranium and Apricot Cleansing Oil, which was chosen by choreographer Lynne Paige. She picked it as it is amazing at getting rid of stage make-up, meaning we could pick bold looks that wouldn’t be able to come off with just a make-up wipe. And she chose the oil because she knew it wouldn’t damage our skin, as we had to practice taking off the products multiple times. I usually use a make-up wipe, and then wash my face to get rid of bright make-up, so it was totally new to me.

As an aspiring actress, being confident (or at least, faking it!) is part of my job, though I can honestly say walking on the stage was one of the scariest things I have ever done. The only thing which kept my nerves in tow was thinking that Jess Glynne – one of the biggest forces in British pop – and the other girls on stage were in the exact same position as me.

Our phones were vital to the set as we were using them as mirrors. I was dying to let everyone know that I was going to be on TV, but somehow I kept my mouth shut and refrained from posting all about it on social media. My phone was on airplane mode – obviously! - but I was paranoid and petrified something would go wrong. (Like what if the whole nation would see one my friend’s texts sending me cry-laugh emojis when they spotted my face?!)

Going backstage after Jess’ incredible – and brave – performance was overwhelming. It felt so ridiculously empowering to walk off stage without a speck of make-up on. While I was on stage, I didn’t have time for it to sink in just what was happening. But then, all in the space of three minutes, the most challenging – and exciting – thing I had ever done was over.

Read more: check out all the red-carpet moments from the BRITs 2019

As soon as my phone was switched off airplane mode, it went wild as my friends were texting and Facebooking me pictures of my face on TV. It was so surreal. The reaction to the performance was amazing.

Quite rightly, Jess was praised, with hundreds and hundreds of Tweets saying just how powerful it was – especially at an event which is as glam as the Brits. With another strong performance from Little Mix (and an ill-placed joke from Jack Whitehall – but I’m not going to dwell on it) and with Matty Healy using The 1975’s acceptance speech to call out misogyny in the music industry, it truly felt like, in some tiny way, I was part of a feminist event which will start to pave change in a difficult industry.

And, in a much smaller way, what happened on Wednesday night made me confident enough to feel like I don’t have to wear make-up all the time. As Jess sang, who I am is enough.

As told to Bonnie McLaren