Didn’t get a Glastonburyticket? Pah, who gives a monkey's? All your friends who are going are just going to be standing freezing in a field, wearing seven jumpers and battling with the wind while they try and roll a soggy fag with one hand and clasp their litre bottle of magic juice (essentially vodka, gin and some week-old orange juice) in the other. Does that sounds like fun? Of course it does, but you're not going are you so let's do our best to make the most of this miserable weekend.
Here's a few things to do that are nearly as good.
Watch The Glasto Coverage With Alice Levine
I mean it’s probably preferable isn’t it really; watching it all from the comfort of your living room with a glass (or seven) of wine in hand? Lovely, lovely Alice Levine is one of this year’s presenters for the BBC Glasto coverage and she’s told us who we need to press the red button for: ‘Years and Years have done amazing things since the early days. Their songs feel really easy to sing-a-long to, even when you don't actually know the words. Lianne La Havas is absolutely sublime live (and I don't think I've ever used the word sublime). Slaves are taking everyone's breath away at the moment. Plus Lionel....well it's just Lionel, isn't it?! Also, I had a great interview with Florence a couple of weeks back, a really intimate chat, we had about half an hour together and I felt like she was really frank and open and that she enjoyed it. One of my favourites that I've ever done actually. I'm nervous I might bowl up to her and say hi, and she won't have a clue who I am!’
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Go to another festival (that’s probably less muddy) – Forest Live and Bristol Summertime
Glasto’s not the only festival on this weekend. Check out Tom Odell at Forest Live in Sherwood Forest in Nottingham on the 26th along with Rae Morris and Alfie Connor for the princely sum of £37.50. Or, head to Bristol for the Bristol Summer Series to catch Seasick Steve on the 26th and Jessie J on the 27th. Not a muddy puddle in sight. Promise.
Tom Odell at Forest Live, 26th June, Sherwood Forest.
Seasick Steve and Jessie J at Bristol Summer Series, 26th, 27th June, Bristol Harbourside
Join the best party of them all – Pride in London
Last year, 30,000 people danced, performed, paraded and roller-skated across London, and this year Pride in London is back and is bigger than ever. This year’s theme is ‘heroes’ so make of that what you will and be sure to join the parade as it marches from Baker Street to Trafalgar Square, where it ends with a concert. I mean, Blue are performing so NBD (squeals inside).
Pride in London, 27th June, Trafalgar Square, 1-8 pm
Avoid the rain and head for a film - Minions and The Overnight
Because Glastonbury weekend is statistically the wettest weekend all summer, there's a reason why it's famous for mud, mud and glorious mud. Stay sane, warm and indoors and get yourself to a cinema. There’s two films out this weekend (if you haven’t already see Jurassic World obvs) that are worth your time. For starters check out Minions, the stupidly hyped animated film that’s the follow-on from Despicable Me 1 and 2. Plus, also check out The Overnight, the film staring Taylor Schilling aka Piper from Orange Is The New Black as one half of a couple that finds themselves in a deeply awkward double date that’s less ‘friends out to dinner’ and more ‘let’s all have a lot of sex.’
Go all highbrow - BP Portrait Award
Three artists have been shortlisted for first prize at the 2015 BP Portrait Award: Matan Ben-Cnaan, Michael Gaskell and Borja Buces Renardand their portraits are shown alongside 55 others in a FREE exhibition which returns to the National Portrait Gallery for three months this summer, starting in June.
BP Portrait Award, 18th June- 20th September, National Portrait Gallery
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Follow Jess on Twitter @Jess_Commons
This article originally appeared on The Debrief.