Imagine going through one of the most unthinkable traumas a person can experience – losing your mum when you’re still a child. Then imagine the world spends the next two decades speculating about what she would have been like, who she’d have turned into, how she'd have looked and how she’d have dressed at every age.
That’s what Prince William and Prince Harry have had to deal with ever since they lost their mum – Princess Diana – when she was killed after suffering fatal injuries in a car crash in 1997, at just 36.
Now, as we prepare to see the Diana statue unveiled today, people are searching 'What would Diana look like now?' and 'What would Princess Diana look like now if she had lived?'
She's also back on the cover of Tatler, 24 years after her death, with a special edition dedicated to celebrating her and asking the peculiar question: ‘Who would she have been at 60?’
This speculation around Diana feels like it’s turning into fan fic – where someone takes a story or character from a novel or TV show and creates their own narrative based on it, imaging what else the character goes on to do. This is someone who has died we’re talking about though, someone’s mum and daughter – not imagining what Bella Swan and Edward Cullen got up to next after the Twilight saga ended. It’s just plain creepy and insensitive.
Obviously she was an icon and hero, loved and revered worldwide, and we weren’t going to simply stop talking about her. But commemorating someone and keeping them in our thoughts can be done tastefully and respectfully, looking back on their life and celebrating who she was. Not trying to guess what she'd look like now.
Former editor of Tatler Tina Brown writes for the magazine, ‘Who would Diana have been at 60? I think she would have achieved it all. She was an obsessive communicator – her Instagram account’s numbers would have rivalled the Pope’s.’
Journalist Vivienne Parry muses: ‘It’s interesting to speculate what Diana would have been doing at 60. She could have become a globe-trotting celebrity à la Elizabeth Taylor. But I think she was about to become a significant global presence. I think she would have ended the use of landmines. She would be involved in mental-health causes. She would be a contented grandmother. And, above all, just as her own mother did for her, she would be telling her grandchildren that with privilege comes responsibility.’
These are just a few of the tributes to commemorate her 60th birthday, which increasingly seems to be going the way of her 50th, when Newsweek did a similar imaginary take on her life now, which the Mail also ran. They even went as far as doctoring a photo to imagine what she would have looked like then and predicting she'd have botox.
However glowing and positive the speculation is about who she might have been if she were alive today, we can’t possible know, so guessing how her future would have turned out takes away her agency – for example, she might have boycotted Instagram for all we know.
We also have no idea how it feels to read others’ ideas about what a deceased loved one would have done next or see a nation guessing what your mother might look like if she was still here. It could be poignant and emotional at best, but it might be heart-breaking and enraging. Our idea of who she would have turned into could be a far cry from how her family imagine her life might have gone.
As if it wasn’t traumatising enough walking behind her coffin at the ages of 15 (Williams) and 12 (Harry) with the glare of the world’s cameras on them, her sons have had to face a constant barrage of make believe stories about what their mum might do, think or wear these days.
Diana’s psychic and ‘energy healer’ Simone Simmons spouted nonsense about how she would have voted leave after the Brexit referendum– a story unhelpfully picked up widely as if reporting actual news.
Let’s remember her life, her many achievements and celebrate her when her birthdays roll around, but enough with the obession over 'what would Diana look like now', and who she might have been today - turning her into a fictional character who we can control. Today is probably already a difficult day for the family. Instead of this fan fic, it’s time we finally let them grieve in peace.
READ MORE: What You Need To Know About The Princess Diana Memorial Statue Event
Read more: Prince Harry Opens Up About Mental Health As He Continues Royal Commitments