It's hard to say that you made a word up without sounding like a complete egotist. We all went to school with someone who claimed they'd invented the McDonalds slogan, or had the idea for the digital photo frame first. But in the case of sadfishing, I really did make it up.
I made it up last year, after Kendall Jenner ran a teaser campaign ahead of her collaboration with Proactiv. She sat in a white T-shirt, face to camera, saying that she was finally ready to share her secret. The internet went bonkers. Was she coming out? Was she going to add her voice to the #MeToo movement? Nope. She eventually told us that she used to have spots.
Having bad skin can be traumatic, I get that. But Kendall didn't share an unfiltered picture of her acne to her Instagram to normalise having skin problems. She shared a beautifully shot teaser video where her skin glowed with perfection. That's sadfishing.
Sadfishing also happens in everyday life, with non-celebs. You've almost certainly got a friend who posts things like 'I don't know how to cope with this' on Instagram, or 'I guess you know who your real friends are' on Facebook. They check in at the hospital and allow people to assume they're in A&E when really they're having a mole looked at.
Trying to get people to worry about you in order to get attention if you're a normie, or money and fame is you're a celeb, is sadfishing. Earlier this week the expression hit the headlines following a study that found young people were 'sadfishing' online, and that it was making them even unhappier.
Digital Awareness UK, a digital wellness agency aimed at improving digital awareness and the impact of the internet on young people, interviewed 50,000 children aged 11-16 about their use of technology, and found that when they went online to talk about their problems in genuine need of support they were likely to end up either disappointed at not getting the response they wanted.
Of course that's the case. They don't have millions of fans clamoring for their love, unlike the celebrities who they are emulating. Instead of fans, most teens have peers, and teenagers enjoy gossip and have a cruel streak.
How celebrities use their social media informs how young people use theirs. When someone with 1.7 million followers says they're feeling sad, the outcry from their devoted fans will be resounding. When you're a 14-year-old with 75 followers, it's not going to be the same. And even if it was, there is something extremely hollow about social-media support.
Sadfishers maximise the drama of their situation to create engagement on social media. It's the emotional equivalent of clickbait. And unfortunately, that has a knock-on effect.
Sadfishing is not a judgemental term for people who are open about their mental health struggles online. It is patently a good thing if people, high-profile or otherwise, are open about their mental health in public forums. It reduces the stigma attached to seeking help, and it strips away a culture of silence around unhappiness.
Mental health issues are not cured, or even alleviated, by someone who follows you sending you a shower of kissy face emojis. Social-media support is a band-aid for a bullet hole, and while it might feel nice in the moment, it doesn't change any of the root causes.
There is also an aspect of vulnerability created by sadfishing. When young people post extensively online about their worries and fears, they are more likely to be targeted by predators who will exploit their unhappiness for their own gain. The researchers found that children who 'sadfish' online are more likely to be groomed.
There is nothing wrong with sharing your feelings online, if that's what you need to do. But young people – and, in fact, all people – who are suffering from mental-health issues should not use Instagram or any other form of social media as their sole form of emotional support. If you're struggling you should be meeting with your GP, referred for therapy and, if needs be, offered antidepressants.
Where it is at all possible, a support network should comprise real people, not screens.
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